this post was submitted on 15 Jul 2023
339 points (92.7% liked)
Memes
45737 readers
536 users here now
Rules:
- Be civil and nice.
- Try not to excessively repost, as a rule of thumb, wait at least 2 months to do it if you have to.
founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
I'd need a lawyer.
Does perfect health last forever? No brainer then. Definitely don't take the time pauses when you sleep /are unconscious without perfect health though, because then no one could perform surgery on you that requires general anesthesia, which could cause problems.
And arguably, being sleep deprived is not being in perfect health, so if you take perfect health you might not ever need to sleep again anyway, depending on the fine print.
And how precise is the telekinesis? Does it work on things like liquids and gasses? Could you use it to separate liquids and gasses according to type, for instance? If so it'd be more than just fun, it could be quite valuable for sciencey stuff, and you could probably make bank separating out things that are quite hard to isolate. And even if not, you might have a good career in hazardous material handling, and or manipulation of things through clean room windows.
The infinite money trick is also incredibly tempting. Does it work on things like houses and boats? Is it legal? Would you have sufficient proof of its legitimacy that if you, say, pulled a couple hundred grand out of your pocket to buy a house that the sellers would trust that it's real and above board even if it were?
And so on. Temptation is health and telekinesis, but the various details might cause money to win out over telekinesis.
Maybe natural talent health, but I'd have to plan out what talents to acquire first, as well as information on degree. If with slight work you could become the optimal physicist etc, to the point where you could sit down and just write a perfect theory of everything that matched all our observations on paper, then that would of course be awesome. But if it doesn't come with essentially super skills - well, I'm pretty ok with what I can do/how well I can learn now, and telekinesis sounds fun.
This is very well thought out.
Also what range. Could you remotely rear naked choke anyone in the world, or just apply a leg press of a couple hundred pounds to their brain stem or some shit? Punch world leaders in the nuts at will? Crash planes by fucking with flight controls? Deorbit satellites? Divert asteroids into earth's path?
Also, could you double jump or straight fly with it?
Manipulate roulette balls for quick money or meddle in sporting events you bet on (just telekinetically stuffing basketball shots and putt attempts and shit would be hilarious). Seems like telekinesis would be amazing.
I'm assuming that #5 is limited by the space in your pockets/purse and would only trigger if and only if you owe a debt on something to someone within your visual range. Additionally they would need to speak to you verbally what exact amount you need to trigger the pocket filling.
Thus; you could not likely pull out amounts even exceeding a few hundred thousand without some really clever planning.
I'm also assuming you will never simply pull a check out of your pocket, this superpower is CASH ONLY, which burdens you with the advantages and disadvantages of cash.
But like, if you never hand over the cash, don't you still owe them the money, and then you just repeat until want? You could arbitrate or even actually owe a great debt in the thousands or tens of thousands of dollars, roll up in some cargo shorts, and then just effectively print money double fisting your shorts.
It would seem you didn't understand my message.
No; you could not exploit it in this way. If you do not intend to pay a person then you do not need the money and have no debt you are seeking to pay. The generated cash would simply vanish from your pocket.
That cash is leaving your pocket one way or another; either by willing to pay somebody and actually doing it or it vanishing.
Nothing about your original message implies the intent of the power holder, nor does the original prompt imply the intent of the power holder. Someone can both have a debt owed by them to someone in their immediate vicinity and also have no intention of paying that debt. If I owe a friend $100, does my power require me to state or intend on paying that debt? Or is the requirement fulfilled because I have an immediate debt to pay and I'm fishing in my pocket for "change"? All of the listed powers are either easily exploitable or can be rules-lawyered to mediocrity.
Well it says exact "change" so I think yes if you dumped a few hundred thousand $1 coins out of your pocket when it's time to pay they'll think it's sus lol
I suppose though if they refuse it you've already generated it and can scoop it up into a wheel barrow and see if a bank will take it. They may not care about the coins too much but they'll definitely be reporting a guy bringing in a few hundred thousand dollars in coins every now and again to the IRS.
Pay your taxes on it and no problem.