Transfem

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A community for transfeminine people and experiences.

This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.

Debate surrounding transgender rights or acceptance will result in an immediate ban.

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Some helpful links:

The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
Gender Spectrum // Resources for youth, parents and family, educators, mental health professionals and faith leaders.

Support Hotlines:

The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.

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Wanting something desperately but not ready now? (lemmy.blahaj.zone)

submitted 1 year ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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I think I'm struggling a bit on my self acceptance.

For example, I know that HRT is something I want. But I'm not ready for it right now. I have this strong desire to start it and start a more noticeable transition, but after looking more into it I got scared and dysphoric almost about the whole thing?

I have moments where I'm confident and want to move forward but also moments where I'm scared and it feels like too much.

Plus I feel like I'm running out the clock on my transition. I'm almost 30 and only came out to myself and my wife a month ago. I feel like I've wasted a lot of my life already in the wrong body and I feel like I need to play catch up almost.

I guess I'm wondering if these are common feelings people have when first starting off? Knowing that you want something for your transition but just not being ready yet. And this weird sense of time slipping away even faster than before? Almost like a mid life crisis... like a beginning transition crisis, lol

Just something I've been conflicted over the past week that I thought I would share with y'all. ❤️

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Thanks for the positive words! I honestly don't think the lower libido is as bad as it seems but it depends on the person. For me I'd say mine about halved but I've heard that progesterone can bring it back up. Other than that I haven't had any sexual changes that I see as negative, except for that I will probably never have bio kids lol. Taking it slow with wearing femme clothes around the house is a good way to build up confidence. I did that for about two years before I finally went outside in femme clothes for the first time. Dysphoria tends to push you to do things you are afraid to do or not feeling ready to do yet because you get to a point where you can't take it anymore. I know you want to wait to maybe have a second kid but if your dysphoria gets bad enough it might force you to make a decision earlier than you wanted to, if mine wasn't so bad I would have waited longer to do sperm banking. I wish you well on your future transition endeavors!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Yeah that makes sense. I know I have aspects of dysphoria that have really ramped up since self accepting. Particularly body hair. I've always hated the amount of hair on my body and now I can't take it anymore so I've been shaving like every other day even though it takes me so long 😭

But the next day I feel a lot better about myself so I try and use that as my motivator. Lol. Just got my first bit of femme clothing (undies) and almost cried putting them on (in a good way) so I'm just riding off that euphoria for a bit.

Funny enough, having my kid actually put all of this into high gear for me because he loves me for me. He loves that I'm affectionate and more motherly and when I realized I felt more like a mom than your typical "dad" I knew something was happening in my subconscious. So the prospect of having a second when/if my wife and I are ready has a lot of mixed feelings attached.

Thank you so much for your input and perspective! :)