this post was submitted on 23 Sep 2023
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[–] [email protected] 69 points 1 year ago (3 children)

It would just lead to the decay of society where nobody is responsible for their own commitments.

[–] [email protected] 78 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Two people both wanting to cancel, forcing themselves to go to something neither of them want to be at, is truly the backbone of society.

[–] [email protected] 39 points 1 year ago (2 children)

When you phrase it like that, it sounds ridiculous. But for me, social events are a lot like going to the gym. It makes me anxious, I don't want to do it, I find reasons to avoid it, and then I'm glad I did it.

It's hard working up the motivation. It's easy to make excuses. Ultimately, it's good for my physical and mental well-being to get out of the house and see people. Having another way to weasel out of it guilt-free would be a net negative on my life for sure.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 year ago

This is a really interesting take because the majority of negative reactions to this post are "why would anyone need this just cancel you coward don't you know how to talk to people" while yours is "yes I understand the point and would want to use this if it existed, therefore it must not exist because it's bad for me" lmao

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I mean, they could both have a little more backbone themselves and actually say to each other, "Oh wait. I don't actually want to go out today. Maybe we can plan something in the future. Have a good night/day/whatever." That's simply too much to ask though I guess.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

But you do want to go out, if they do.

[–] [email protected] -1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

No you don't, you just do it because you said you would and the other expects you to

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Well the important thing is that you're here to tell me I'm wrong about what I do and don't want.

You may not have any nuance when it comes to whether or not you want to do things, I get it, kind of. A lot of people here seem to be very black and white about either you want to or you don't and really can't wrap their head around the idea that others have shades of gray and conditions that can effect whether or not they want to go.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Good answer. I like these thoughtful responses and I agree with you on the matter

Sometimes you want to meet only when you know the other one really wants to meet too. And sometimes you don't want to go, but as soon as you arrive, you are glad you did it. Life is not just black and white

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

It's not literal you in this case, it's you (as in me). Not sure how to explain it otherwise. You were talking about how "you do this" and I don't think you meant that literally, same with my reply. Do you get it?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I've met a lot of friends and found a bunch of hobbies by forcing myself to go to something I didn't think i wanted to go to, or was too nervous to attend because I was afraid of canceling.

[–] [email protected] -4 points 1 year ago

Then you'd never cancel and this would be irrelevant to you

[–] [email protected] 36 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It would just lead to the decay of society

Add it the pile, I guess.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

We’re all so fucked and nearly all of us know it, gotta laugh or you’ll cry

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

All civilization was just an attempt to avoid looking like a douche.

DON'T CANCEL PLANS.

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