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I feel it. Not so much "wasted" as "taken from me." Between school that did nothing but hold me back and cause me anxiety to the time since that I've lost to said anxiety and probably-related depression, I feel like my life never really began. Now I look around at the things I "have to do" or "have to get done" and it's all so overwhelming that I just want to sleep instead. Even though I know damn well I'll feel better and enjoy the payoff if I actually do the things. And then I see people half my age doing all the things OP mentions, and honestly I feel exhausted just looking at those people. Like how the fuck do you run a startup? I have a goddamn master's degree and I can't figure out how to register a business let alone run one. And you do this every day? I mean, I remember doing ten-plus-hour days when I was working and going to school at the same time and I didn't have a choice, but now? Holy shit, no.
Relatable in everything you mentioned
Yes, I really feel like this is not something that is gained by conventional wisdom. And it's sad because when you ask people to explain, literally "tell me", they give some useless answer all the time
No one can know everything or do everything. It's impossible. Those people pay experts. They aren't doing everything on their own. The secret to life is to share the loads. There are studies into it and a lot of those people who grind for 18 hours a day are phoning it. No human can be productive more than 4 hours a day. The rest is a lot of meetings and shooting the shit for networking. There's a reason the number 1 predictor of startup success is how much money the founders have to burn before the company is profitable or bankrupt. That money is to pay for those with management, business and law degrees. To pay for the engineers and technicians. The people who are experts on what the founders are not and together get the complex job done and a product out the door. Grind or daily hours of time invested working is like halfway down the list.