Transfem

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A community for transfeminine people and experiences.

This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.

Debate surrounding transgender rights or acceptance will result in an immediate ban.

Please follow the rules of the lemmy.blahaj.zone instance.
Bigotry of any kind will not be tolerated.
Gatekeeping will not be tolerated.
Please be kind and respectful to all.
Please tag NSFW topics.
No NSFW image posts.
Please provide content warnings where appropriate.
Please do not repost bigoted content here.

Posters may express that they are looking for responses and support from groups with certain experiences (eg. trans people, trans people with supportive parents, trans parents.). Please respect those requests and be mindful that your experience may differ from others here.

To make such a request, at the start of the body of your post, not in the title, the first line should look like the this: [Requesting Engagement from _________]

Some helpful links:

The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
Gender Spectrum // Resources for youth, parents and family, educators, mental health professionals and faith leaders.

Support Hotlines:

The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.

founded 1 year ago

MODERATORS

[email protected]

Well, I came out to my mom, and now I play the waiting game. (lemmy.blahaj.zone)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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"Wow is all I can say. We can talk tomorrow. I love you."

Spaces and all. (edit: the spaces were like 5 and exaggerated, I forgot markdown formatted them out)

She came to me with a business proposition, so I had to tell her sooner than later if she was being serious and wanted to have a long term business relationship.

I told her how I felt, that my partner is supportive, that I've been on HRT. Showed her selfies over the years and how miserable I was, contrasted with the natural smile genderbent selfies.

I know it's a lot to take in, but I'm a bit nervous, and her response doesn't inspire confidence.

I have to respect her and give her time to process, but I know she is starting from a transphobic position, and she probably wants to go vomit now.

She kicked me out of the house because I was platonically hanging out with an effeminate male and screamed at me about how she couldn't believe I would let that thing into her house, so I know exactly how she feels about it all.

If she gets all mad and such I don't mind going full no contact, as that has already happened multiple times between us, but is it too much an ask to just be accepted?

I'm the same person I always was, just with a lot more mental clarity, a happier disposition, and eventually I'm going to be a much more feminine looking person.

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

All I can truly say is you deserve love and acceptance. If she's not willing to give you those things then she doesn't deserve to have a wonderful daughter like you. You sound like you've prepared yourself for the worst, but make sure to talk lots to your partner, your therapist if you have one and your friends about it. Bottling this up inside can be agonizing and deal serious long term damage.

I know that having gone no contact before makes you feel a bit emotionally shielded from her. I know it did for me when I cut my mom out. But her being your mom gives her a lot of power to heal or to harm you. So be careful when dealing with her, and always put your own emotional wellbeing first.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

Thank you for the support and reminder