this post was submitted on 20 Jan 2025
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Blahaj Lemmy Meta

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Blåhaj Lemmy is a Lemmy instance attached to blahaj.zone. This is a group for questions or discussions relevant to either instance.

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TL;DR - Lemmy's userbase compare to Reddit just feel more angry and it so offputting when asking a question and getting an answer that sound like their pissed off. Feels oddly worse than Reddit.

Honestly, I want to like Lemmy as I want to try not use Reddit as much. The thing that is holding me back is I hate the users on Lemmy which their often passive aggressive and really snarky. I know Reddit does have those people but I always seen more them on Lemmy where I barely used it as much.

I asked on AskLemmy community if there's any Gen-Z community around, ideally just talking about nostalgia and stuff like that. Nothing malicious at all. Then got a angry reply saying "Fuck Gen-what, just join community and post!" and telling me about generation are there to "divide" people. Apparently, me asking community which mainly be me talking about cartoon and games I grow up with is evil.

If the tone was at least "This may not matter as much and you find it better picking any community that in your best interest" then I'm be alright, it the way they seem pissed at me for even asking it like I'm an idiot which gets to me. When I told that person to calm down and stop being snarky, I got reply from other users saying they wasn't.

Might stick to Reddit for now. I know it not great but it in my experince isn't as easily pissed off and is actually bareable to scroll for awhile. I hate talking bad about Lemmy as I really want to like it but I just hate the userbase so much that it feels pointless to even properly use it as much.

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Ive found myself actually reading a ton of threads from hexbear, and ive found them to be some of the most civil and welcoming lemmy users PROVIDED they dont think that youre arguing in bad faith. They can be quick to dismiss anyone who seems like a bad actor, and i think thats totally fair, because its rude as hell to go into someones safe space and start acting like you know better or being dismissive of their beliefs. Especially when you dont actually want a well reasoned answer, you just want to stir shit. Hexbear users are great, opinionated people. Lemmy.world users (and mods especially) seem to be terrible, opinionated people. Hexbear totally doesnt deserve the bad rap they get imo, and their trans community is awesome.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

because its rude as hell to go into someones safe space and start acting like you know better or being dismissive of their beliefs. Especially when you dont actually want a well reasoned answer, you just want to stir shit.

You're running on a lot of assumptions.

I made a comment that had nothing to do with any of that. It received quite a few upvotes (10+), then someone misread it and accused me of antisemitic dog whistling, which was not the case. In other words, they were stirring up shit and making a bad-faith argument.

So I clarified my position, then other users piled on, the mod(s) deleted my comments, and I left.

And the user who made that accusation had made what could be perceived as an anti-Italian remark in a comment a few days before. My paternal grandparents were Italian. Needless to say, I was a bit upset that this person didn't follow the very strict standards that they held me to.

(By the way, Blahaj is also an LGBTQ+ safe space. The difference is, they're not assholes.)

Feel free to check my post history.

In the meantime, I'll leave you with some recommended reading, here and here.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Im not assuming anything, im sharing my experience with theeads that ive read and commented in. You can share your experience too, im not going to invalidate it, but it might be helpful if rather than just alluding to some comment that got deleted, you posted what the actual content was. Also a comment getting deleted is a pretty tame response to something thats generating controversy, regardless of what that content was. I notice you didnt mention being banned.

Regardless people can make up their own mind. Hexbears threads are all there out in the open. Im just saying i vastly prefer the majority of discourse and conversation that ive seen over there than i do most .world threads, which end up being incredibly hostile, childish, and ignorant, in my experience. I have no complaints about blahaj users at all.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago* (last edited 21 hours ago) (1 children)

but it might be helpful if rather than just alluding to some comment that got deleted, you posted what the actual content was.

I can't recall the exact wording of my comment, but the gist of it was that three celebrities were protesting an attempt to bar Israel from a music contest because of the ongoing genocide. I pointed out that the three celebrities were Jewish, so it was kind of cynical for them to do that. Those who upvoted understood what I meant, but then someone else accused me of antisemitism -- because I didn't specifically identify them as "Zionist".

How am I supposed to know whether they're Zionist? As far as I know, they've never publicly identified themselves as such, and it could be perceived as offensive if I did.

I notice you didnt mention being banned.

No, I wasn't. Hopefully you've read the two items I had posted before, which pretty much validated how I felt about what I'd experienced, and why I left.

Listen, if you like Hexbear, fine; that's your business. I don't.

most .world threads, which end up being incredibly hostile, childish, and ignorant

Agreed, and that's why I also avoid them (and Beehaw, Hexbear and .ml).

[–] [email protected] 1 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

What was your username that you used to post? I'm sure we can find it in the modlog.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 12 hours ago) (1 children)

Maybe "we" shouldn't be so intrusive.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 hours ago

Heard, i can guess what actually happened then.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago (2 children)

My experience with hexbear was similar to my experiences with 8chan in that it was full of unreasonably hostile people with poor education and social skills.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 20 hours ago)

To be fair, the person I had mentioned before seemed reasonably intelligent but unreasonably hostile.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

Hey there! A lot of users on hexbear are from various countries, living in poverty, unhoused, and/or part of a marginalized community. It's very cool of you to say a lot of us are unreasonably hostile and uneducated.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

If I told you to go fuck yourself as a response would that be an unreasonably hostile response? How about I told ypu that your entire family should be murdered because you exist, would that be unreasonable? I would say yes to both and yet my very first two replies on hexbear were those.

They were uneducated because at the time it was a forum filled with "leftists" who seemingly understand leftism through memes, infographics and social media rather than the books you can find online for free. If they can find Lemmy they can find archive.org and other places with free books to provide real education on leftism. Not surprisingly most know fuckall about economics while thinking they do because that seems to be a common thing for younger leftists. This has nothing to do with wealth as how would I know what people are worth just by knowing where they live?

As you know literally nothing about me at all maybe don't pass judgement because you don't have any clue what you're talking about.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago)

Very cool and very normal response.

If I told you to go fuck yourself as a response would that be an unreasonably hostile response? How about I told ypu that your entire family should be murdered because you exist, would that be unreasonable?

Well that depends, are you normally told both of these things on a daily basis solely because of immutable characteristics of your being? Because 48% of hexbear users are, if we're ONLY going off the amount of trans people on the site.

They were uneducated because at the time it was a forum filled with “leftists” who seemingly understand leftism through memes, and blah blah blah I'm a dirty fucking classist asshole who thinks nobody is nearly as smart as I am and can't imagine anyone would come to the conclusion that hexbear users did without being young and naive that seems to be a common thing for younger leftists.

Sis.... do I really have to point out how you're being an asshole with this one? Nearly every person I talk to on hexbear is 20+ and has some kind of income source. The majority of us read actual theory, we have a weekly book club for group reading and discussion of theory. Your view of other people is so narrow that you seriously think people are swayed towards wanting genuine revolution by memes, when the reality is that most (if not all) of us have been personally affected by the horrors of capitalism and have been pushed to desperation that the only way we can see forward is dismantling the current system.

This has nothing to do with wealth as how would I know what people are worth just by knowing where they live?

Okay....? Idk what you were trying to say with this but I can assume you meant to say that you couldn't tell that we have people that are impoverished or unhoused.

Girl, it doesn't take much to find out we have a mutual aid community and some of our users openly speak about struggling with drugs and homelessness. We don't put it on display, but it's not exactly a secret. If you had bothered to look rather than make blanket assumptions about an entire community, maybe you'd have noticed, but you clearly bought into the "evul tankies gommunism red fash" bullshit that 196 and the other vaushites and redditors spout on lemmy.

As you know literally nothing about me at all maybe don’t pass judgement because you don’t have any clue what you’re talking about.

I didn't pass judgment on you? You're literally doing exactly what you're talking about actually, about an entire community.

I would say yes to both and yet my very first two replies on hexbear were those.

Gee with a response like this it's hard to wonder what you could have said to piss them off.