Transfem
A community for transfeminine people and experiences.
This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.
Debate surrounding transgender rights or acceptance will result in an immediate ban.
- Please follow the rules of the lemmy.blahaj.zone instance.
- Bigotry of any kind will not be tolerated.
- Gatekeeping will not be tolerated.
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Posters may express that they are looking for responses and support from groups with certain experiences (eg. trans people, trans people with supportive parents, trans parents.). Please respect those requests and be mindful that your experience may differ from others here.
To make such a request, at the start of the body of your post, not in the title, the first line should look like the this: [Requesting Engagement from _________]
Some helpful links:
- The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
- Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
- LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
- Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
- TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
- TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
- Gender Spectrum // Resources for youth, parents and family, educators, mental health professionals and faith leaders.
Support Hotlines:
- The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
- TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
- LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
- 988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.
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I also struggle with "triangulation" - when I have problem with person A (let's call them Alice), I go to person B (obviously named Bob) and vent about it with Bob so I don't blow up on Alice.
Sometimes a therapist is a better person to talk to than Bob, but they're not usually there for you when you need them (usually the venting is more immediate).
The triangulation with Bob is probably most unhealthy when it becomes a habituated way to enable dysfunction in your relationship with Alice, because the problem never gets addressed with Alice because you can work out all your frustration over the problem with Bob.
Sometimes it's best to just calm down first (without discharging all motivation or energy to deal with the problem with Alice), and then think through the right way to approach Alice and talk through the problem. This is where a therapist can be helpful: strategizing how to address the relationship problems. However, as you might guess this also can easily turn into emotional triangulation while appearing to be Entirely Healthy™️.
Anyway, I'm sorry - I hope you are able to take care of yourself and feel better. Sometimes when I'm sad and overwhelmed it's because of something else: I'm tired, hungry, over-worked, etc. and addressing those other things then make it easier for me to think more clearly and regulate my emotions better. I know that's easier said than done, but identifying what self-care you need and organizing around that can really help.