this post was submitted on 08 Sep 2024
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[–] [email protected] 137 points 2 months ago (4 children)

"So then li'l blorko was like I'll totally glomp that and he was ratioed by woffle's stans when they.."

You bolt awake in the mountains of Carthage. You are not online. It is 217 BC. You are the general Hannibal, and you have changed your mind. The future cannot come to pass. Rome must burn.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Is this a copypasta or just new greatness?

[–] [email protected] 28 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Copypasta, i’ve seen it many times before

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago (3 children)

Not always involving Rome. Not always the past. Not always even human when you wake up.

But for a brief moment I can try to imagine how good that must feel to not have any of this be a concern of mine, because I'm so far removed from it, it cannot affect me.

Like waking up as a sentient mycelium colony on a distant planet. Who gives a shit about housing prices or what youtube channel is allegedly being treated unfairly when your sole purpose is to slowly expand across the surface of an alien world and you can instead contemplate the quality of nutrients.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

your sole purpose is to slowly expand across the surface of an alien world and you can instead contemplate the quality of nutrients.

Zoom out far enough, and that describes humanity, too.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

Careful, Hobbes. Calvin needs to be home for dinner, soon, so keep it simple.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

And suddenly you bolt awake in the mountains of Carthage. You are not online. It is 217 BC. You are the general Hannibal, and you have changed your mind. The future cannot come to pass. Rome must burn.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (4 children)

“So then li’l blorko was like I’ll totally glomp that and he was ratioed by woffle’s stans when they…”

I have to know: are these words made-up or is the influence of vapid youtube whores ruinin--uh, I mean "evolving English the way linguists think is cool and proper"?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

Ic hæfde to witan: sind þas word gemæne oððe is þæs unþeawfulle YouTube wifru forþfæreð, ic mean "eorðan Englisc swylce þa leornere witaþ is fægere and riht"?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

It's not made up. I sadly understand that sentence.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

We can tell see you fail to understand the linguists take on prescriptivism vs descriptivism because your strawman quote uses the word "proper."

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago

Wait, "glomp" and "ratio" were NOT in the same vernacular. Not by a decade.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

I do not regret clicking that link!