this post was submitted on 31 Mar 2024
33 points (100.0% liked)

Trans

710 readers
16 users here now

General trans community.

Rules:

  1. Follow all blahaj.zone rules

  2. All posts must be trans-related. Other queer-related posts go to c/lgbtq.

  3. Don't post negative, depressing news articles about trans issues unless there is a call to action or a way to help.

Resources:

Best resource: https://github.com/cvyl/awesome-transgender Site with links to resources for just about anything.

Trevor Project: crisis mental health services for LGBTQ people, lots of helpful information and resources: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/

The Gender Dysphoria Bible: useful info on various aspects of gender dysphoria: https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en

StainedGlassWoman: Various useful essays on trans topics: https://stainedglasswoman.substack.com/

Trans resources: https://trans-resources.info/

[USA] Resources for trans people in the South: https://southernequality.org/resources/transinthesouth/#provider-map

[USA] Report discrimination: https://action.aclu.org/legal-intake/report-lgbtqhiv-discrimination

[USA] Keep track on trans legislation and news: https://www.erininthemorning.com/

[GERMANY] Bundesverband Trans: Find medical trans resources: https://www.bundesverband-trans.de/publikationen/leitfaden-fuer-behandlungssuchende/

[GERMANY] Trans DB: Insurance information (may be outdated): https://transdb.de/

[GERMANY] Deutsche Gesellschaft für Transidentität und Intersexualität: They have contact information for their advice centers and some general information for trans and intersex people. They also do activism: dgti.org

*this is a work in progress, and these resources are courtesy of users like you! if you have a resource that helped you out in your trans journey, comment below in the pinned post and I'll add here to pass it on

founded 9 months ago
MODERATORS
 

If you are thinking about harming yourself — get immediate crisis support. Connect to a crisis counselor 24/7, 365 days a year, from anywhere in the U.S via text, chat, or phone. The Trevor Project is 100% confidential and 100% free.

https://www.thetrevorproject.org/get-help/

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago (1 children)

oof, it would be a punch in the gut for me if my spouse said they wouldn't be able to handle practicing with them. It also makes me wonder what they are thinking about the long term, you know ...

I've heard of someone whose spouse told them to only use one voice (the new voice) and not switch back and forth, but that seems almost equally problematic to me.

I've been looking for advice on how to overcome the mental struggles with practicing the voice, here are some things I found (mostly just laying them out for myself, but maybe sharing them here will be useful to someone):

  • read books aloud while practicing your voice
  • join an online community (like a trans voice discord) and practice there (Zheanna Erose from TransVoiceLessons would practice her voice while playing CS:GO)
  • find an IRL trans group where you can practice your voice in a non-judgmental zone, or otherwise make friends with whom you can regularly practice
  • when feeling insecure, motivate yourself by reflecting on the fact that sounding the wrong gender is the default, and it takes work to change that
  • commit to practice the new voice full-time and always use it (this is obviously the hard part, and I might as well just be saying "just do it" at this point)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Oh no! Sorry, I didn't word that well. I meant my wife doesn't want me to just start using my new voice one day out of the blue without giving her some time to adjust.

She is very supportive but is also going to miss my voice as I work on it. So I need to gradually kind of work on it with her present that way she can be a part of the journey and get used to how my voice will change. Does that make more sense? O.o

That is a great list and I find it useful :) it does take a lot of work to get to a point where you're happy with your voice but it'll be worth it (I hope) 😅

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago (1 children)

oh, yeah - that makes more sense, and maybe that's what I would have inferred if I weren't so tired when I read your message, my bad 😄

That actually seems like a great situation because it promotes practicing with your spouse! Maybe they can give good feedback and being involved they can go through the adjustment with you.

These are such big changes, it's a lot for anyone.

Another resource I have outside the stuff mentioned in the /r/transvoice subreddit is The Voice Book for Trans and Non-Binary People, though I haven't finished reading it, so I'm not necessarily recommending as much as just mentioning it in case it helps you.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

Thanks! I'll definitely check it out :)