937
oldie but a goodie (relevant once again in light of him magically not having to pay the $450 million)
(i.kym-cdn.com)
this post was submitted on 27 Mar 2024
937 points (98.0% liked)
Microblog Memes
5754 readers
2176 users here now
A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.
Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.
Rules:
- Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
- Be nice.
- No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.
- Posters are encouraged to link to the toot or tweet etc in the description of posts.
Related communities:
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
That's a horrible story. I had an aquaintance tell me when I was early 20s that when I had kids they wouldn't be as valuable as our friends kids. Why? Because our friends kids are white.
And, at least in the US, that piece of shit wasn't wrong, but I didn't need to hear that.
Did he say valuable, or valued?
Also why do you not need to hear that? Are you planning to ignore the challenges your kids will face? Like … what the fuck is with these parents cutting people out of their lives when they deliver bad news about their kids’ environment?
If someone came to me and said “Hey there’s a coyote outside tonight so don’t let your kids out”, and I said “Well maybe that’s true but I don’t need to hear that shit” then cut them out of my life, I’d see myself as having failed as a parent right there.
Your job is to keep your eyes open, not take steps to purge unpleasant information from your life. I’d be disgusted if you didn’t have kids, but since you adopted the responsibility of having kids and are taking this comfort-over-awareness policy, it’s appalling.
I mean, I would fucking hope I misread your story, but you did tell this story. Here’s how I interpreted it:
I read this as one night in the kitchen with you two having beers at your place, and he says this. Maybe I assumed that wrong? Was it a whole series of conversations, or was it one conversation? If it was a whole series, that’s worse on his part
I honestly think this question is key: was it he who brought up the terms “miscagenate” and “the white race” (those three words in that sequence)?
If he used those specific terms it makes him sound more generally racist. But if you’re introducing them for flavor in the story, that speaks to me of a pattern of amplifying your “he’s racist” interpretation in your own mind.
Why allegedly? You suspect he made it up out of whole cloth? Or did you suspect he only read about the study but not the contents of the study itself?
This, to me, sounds an attempt to be helpful.
I read this as if he’s not presenting uncertainty, but rather certainty, but he’s only read one study and doesn’t have actual expertise, right?
What exactly did he apply this confidence to? Did he confidently say: “I read a study that said X” or “I know that X” or what exactly?
This is the part that made my blood boil. A parent who doesn’t consider a reported threat to their child, even an uncertain or hypothetical one, to be helpful information just freaks me the fuck out. What?
I read this as you cut him out of your life after two instance of him talking about this study: once to you and once to your mutual friend.
If you did that, after twenty years of friendship, that’s fucked up.
Excellent reason to avoid him. But again I don’t know if I trust your judgment yet.
It seems (unless there’s a lot left out and not even mentioned as ommitted) that one mention of a study involving varying risks to varying racial groups was enough for you to deem him a racist. I guess I misread that? There was more racist stuff he was doing too?
So either you fled the country because of this guy, or you did it for a much larger set of reasons, and you just included that fact to set the overall emotional tone of your family’s story around the same time as the end of that friendship?
Sorry if I sound too analytical here, but reference to a “backdrop” really makes it sound like you interpreted this guy’s fumbling attempt to help as a plot line in a much larger story about cutting ties and pulling stakes and going on a big journey.
Fuck both your ex-friend and the internet weirdo arguing with you about your family's safety and value, holy shit. Who asked for their toxic parenting advice/analysis????
You made a decision based on your priorities, and I hope you and your family are doing well, and your child is THRIVING!
How the fuck is anything I said arguing about this person’s family’s value??
What the fuck?
you’re still here?
I hate being bullied. When I get treated with this level of disgust and contempt, it makes me feel undignified to just slink away.
You’re being bullied?
Someone shared a personal story and you took the side of the aggressor, and then tripled down on it.
And you’re being bullied, huh?
“The aggressor”?
The person who said “I read a study that mixed-race kids are at higher risk for suicide” is the aggressor to you?
And the person who cast their twenty year friend as a racist for saying this, and ended that twenty-year friendship for this, is not an aggressor at all?
And yes. You perceiving that I have my own issues with people discarding me, and then knowing exactly where to poke to hit that nerve in me, yes you’re a bully.
And honestly I hope you don’t know it. I hope it takes as long as humanly possible for you to acknowledge it.
I am not in control of your actions, you’re making the decision to continue this line of discussion. I only got involved to begin with to tell you to fuck off. Now here you are, two replies deep, telling me off for bullying you. What’s your endgame?
Do you legitimately not see what you did here? It’s like if you heard a stranger say they were cut off in traffic, and you broke into the conversation to criticize THEIR driving. And then while you’re in the middle of explaining why you’re correct, ANOTHER stranger walks up and says “Why are you hassling this person about their driving?” and you counter with “Stop bullying me.” And now you’re explaining to that second stranger why the person who cut off the first stranger is probably a really great driver, despite the fact that all you have to go on is a summary of a single situation.
Hey bud. You can still choose to be kind today.
Step back for a sec and think about what it would be like for someone to judge your experience of a traumatic event from just a few sentences. You might have misspoken or written it out wrong. You definitely missed some important details. Maybe you embellished or condensed some things to be easier for a stranger to grasp.
I'm not saying this rhetorically. Actually stop and just think for a sec.
Does that help put in perspective why everyone thinks you're being unfair to OP?
Someone correctly indicating that mixed race children have lower standards of living in racist countries such as the United States is not someone who should be shunned
As someone else in this thread already pointed out, you are conveniently ignoring the OP's assertion that the "friend" had themselves become a racist, and later STALKED OP. I can't believe it has to be explained that stalkers shouldn't be defended.
Let's say hypothetically OP was in the wrong, and totally misread the entire situation. They cut someone out of their life who didn't deserve it. That's STILL their fucking prerogative. They don't deserve to be stalked for it.
Also you're siding with somebody who has since recognized they were in the wrong. Read their later replies.
I really don't think OP is a credible source, and I don't find their account to be remotely believable.
My point is that, as a work of creative fiction, not only is their post unbelievable, it's also internally inconsistent
And you take that as an invitation to do this shit?
Your opinion has been weighed on the scales of this public forum and has been found wanting.
You can go whenever.
To do what shit, precisely?
Also, if you communicate like this in person then I doubt you have loved ones or friends. Perhaps you should work on that rather than defending racism and believing lies online
Actually my friends and loved ones display basic human empathy. They don’t berate strangers over the authenticity of their trauma. So I do afford them quite a bit more couth than I feel you’ve earned in this interaction.
I hope that isn’t projection on your part, by the way. At this point I mostly just feel bad for you.
If someone correctly stating that mixed race children have worse outcomes in the United States than white children causes "trauma" in anyone, then that person is too mentally weak to be left unsupervised. Let alone vote.
You can't just throw the word trauma around, especially when it's describing an event that didn't actually happen. Pop psychology is the domain of midwits and advertisers, not thinking people
You are all over the fucken place, now the person who told that story shouldn’t be allowed to vote?
Pseudo-intellectualism probably plays better in the crowds you roll with than it does here.
It’s a good goddamn thing you just think you’re a psychologist.
Stop being autistic and hysterical. Take your meds. Go for a hike. Lose some weight.
Again, sincerely hope you’re not projecting 💖
Why not just go back to exploding-heads or truth social? You and your views are clearly incompatible with this particular instance of Lemmy. There's plenty of instances which cater to your worldview and you won't get this response. If you don't like the culture here, find an instance that matches you. That's the beauty of the fediverse - somewhere, there's an instance and set of apps that caters to your beliefs.
Maybe you are getting bullied because you are a hostile twat, if you bothered to agitate a brain cell you could see you don't have any dignity.
Not sure if you read my last comment at all but it was a lot of effort to identify and step away from assumptions I made.
Sorry you’re an emotional wreck right now. Hope you feel better soon.
Not a lot of people here will say this, but props for recognizing you were in the wrong here. It's not easy to do.
You should slap your father for not having the common decency to wipe you on the curtains.
There is a gigantic difference between "there's a dangerous animal outside that you can do something about." And "your kid isn't white (absolutely nothing you can do about that) so their life might suck more."
One of those you can actually do something about, the other is just "sucks to not be white." It's pretty much useless negativity.
I didn't need to hear it because I lived it and already knew the reality for non white kids growing up here. I didn't need a middle aged white man telling me how it is. And I'd rather cut someone like that out of my life for myself, my kids weren't born then, and they aren't going to hear that story.
Your coyote analogy is flawed. This wasn't an immediate threat that I ignored.
I know what my job is as a parent, probably better than you do.