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When you think about it with 3 instances, it's fun and strange.
Imagine 3 instances. lemmy.world / beehaw.org / lemmy.dbzer0.com.
Now call them A, B and C.
Now A and B defederates.
Accounts on A can't see content published on B anymore. And can't publish on these "forums" (communities/magazines...)
And accounts on B can't see content published on A anymore. And can't publish on these forums.
However, an account on C can see everything and publish anywhere !
--
You should consider your account as a passport. The instance/country delivering you the passport is important, since it gives you permissions/visas. If everyone in your instance is behaving like shit, your instance will be defederated and you'll loose permissions/visas to be able to browse other instances.