LassCalibur

Reducing your dose in order to feel safer is a bad idea. Why not instead focus that anxious energy on educating yourself in a new science hobby? There are many interesting projects involving estrogen!

Actually playing games during dire emotional states throws fuel unto my dissociation/depersonalization/derealization problems; but just mindfully sitting in my favorite place in the Temple of Elune on a private vanilla WoW server works great for me. The sounds, music, colors, lighting effects, and water create a very zen space that helps me observe my thoughts and feelings without getting so tangled up in them. That kind of presence helps me better understand what is really going on and how it all happened.

If things are merely bad then maybe I'll play some original Sims or Rimworld on the coziest of settings. So long as there's no nest of trash around then it's probably okay. Eufloria in relaxed mode is a lovely RTS game that hasn't ever caused me any problems.

Hopefully you find your way through this soon!

Thank you! As a witchy agnostic pagan with christotrauma I love your username too. Sorry for the late reply! Taking long breaks from social media is important to me. Btw grats for living rent free in my head for this long :)

Illinois will issue trans refugees a new birth certificate! This is a recent development and the other sanctuary states will hopefully be pressured to step up and do likewise. So call your state politicians :) Make it happen!

https://www.courthousenews.com/new-illinois-law-to-assist-transgender-residents-with-updating-their-birth-certificates/

If you travel by auto when wearing tight clothes be sure to mind the extra clearance needed for your glasses when getting inside! One of my trendy larger frames took a scratch that way soon after getting them. Also don't limit yourself to just two pairs but instead get some cheap ones to change up your appearance. Accessorize :)

Wikipedia states that NGO Monitor's focus is to "End promotion of 'politically and ideologically motivated anti-Israel agendas' by certain NGOs," that they report "on international NGO activity from a pro-Israel perspective," and that a former online communication editor employed with the group was indefinitely banned for biased editing. Personally I'm more inclined to trust a Wikipedia article with 75 sources unless there is substantial evidence to the contrary.

I’m a hyper-logical type, does engineering things for fun

That's totally cool! Many so far have presented philosophical answers based more in application of reason than empirical inquiry when you might perhaps prefer an answer based in biological science.

I suppose my followup to that would be what gives someone a specific sense of gender?

As a binary trans woman my very being in and for myself imparts upon me a capacity for directly revealed self-knowledge regarding my gender, which is to say how I wish to be as a presence and present myself to others within the world.

To say ‘I am a woman’ is taking societies interpretation of woman as being right.

Perish the thought! In general however I might reveal my gender it is as an invitation to others for them to interact with me and understand me as a woman. Try to think of this as less a matter of being right or wrong and more one of how you and another might best both enjoy your interactions together.

What differentiates that from ‘I am a man who likes womanly things’?

Gender does! It is literally that simple.

What separates the ‘tomboy’ woman from a trans-masc?

They would through their understanding of their own genders which grants truth or grants falsehood to statements regarding their gender.

Due to my low tolerance for the cishetmono nonsense engendering their fascination with us trans folk, I've chosen to beat a wide path around any works by and for cishets involving trans characters. However it would be wonderful to have stories in our own voices with complex characters which challenge viewers to rethink their own relationships with the structural injustices binding our society together. Perhaps some appealing psychopathic antagonists, seductively evil side characters, and morally gray protagonists? Something like the delightfully unapologetic queer feminist streaming adaptation of Killing Eve would be great! Definitely go check it out if you haven't seen it yet!

Binary trans woman.

Yes indeed! You might wish to look into the idea of double consciousness, the dual self-perception experienced by subordinated or colonized groups in an oppressive society. Its a sense of attempting to perceive yourself as both who you know yourself to be and as an oppressive other will perceive you. If you want to smash that noise then you need to learn to stop being ashamed of yourself!

Also, you definitely should be taking the self-defense class appropriate to your gender as violence is very often gendered. There's a podcast episode of The Gender Rebels about one trans women's experience taking Krav Maga you might want to give a listen.

Good luck and take care :)

Yeah the boot process is a mess! Debian's noisy GRUB and unsightly boot text is an obvious and unnecessary paint point for a desktop user but very desirable for server installations. You do have some options though!

Carlo Contavalli apparently has a relatively simple work-around discussed at https://rabexc.org/posts/grub-shush. What I've done in the past is rebuilding Ubuntu's source deb package for GRUB against my Debian system. You can grab it at https://packages.ubuntu.com/source/lunar/grub2. Build instructions can be found here https://unix.stackexchange.com/questions/117503/how-to-compile-a-debian-package-from-source.

The great thing about Debian, Linux, and FLOSS is that you can even automate downloading Debian's source package when it gets updated, applying the silent patch, applying Ubuntu's compilation options, compiling the deb, and installing the deb! But yeah why can some package maintainer not provide such as an option in the repository! It's really an annoyance for many and almost makes me feel like I'm not the type of user the Debian community desires. Like, "Wait... what? You like pretty stuff? GTFO!" Maybe its even true? Hopefully you will enjoy using Debian! Its most preferable to Ubuntu in many ways these days!