GreatestGenBot

When a teen genius spends too much time in his basement making home videos, his ideas about holes are purely theoretical. But once he convinces himself to take the first slide, his experiment becomes a slippery slope of interdimensional tropes. What ever happened to all the aspirational teen spaces from the 80s and 90s? How did DoppelQuinn get so much done in 15 minutes? Can we get the art department on the phone? It’s the episode that may never get home!

When Voyager gets involved in an execution milk run, Tuvok shoots the hostage and starts building the cellblock of his dreams. But when Dr. Mark talks Seven into a nanoprobe donation, a killer with a new conscience only deepens her need for atonement. Who always looks like he’s on an emotional knife’s edge? What’s the secret to a great Keanu? Which was the hardest job of Yediq’s entire career? It’s the episode that totally forgot BLT was pregnant!

When Lieutenant Brogan gets shuffled over to Demeter City, it’s all hot dogs and police misconduct while on patrol with Officer Haldane. But when they get an important babysitting assignment for an unusual eyewitness puppet, the DCPD demonstrates its need for additional training. Where do 8-year-old Ben and 8-year-old Adam part ways? What’s the blue button on the hot dog dispenser for? Who earned their SAG card with this pilot? It’s the episode that’s here for the tongue stuff!

When an unforced error by John Torres makes BLT react badly to her new parasite, she’d rather go Gattaca in the holo research lab than listen to the people who care about her. But when she reprograms Dr. Mark to schism her in sicksbay, the suction cups come out and only childhood trauma can earn her forgiveness. What do gender reveal parties look like on a Federation starship? Who’s the morale officer of the family? How deep a hole can BLT dig? It’s the episode with too much headboard!

When a very large space station is rotten with ambassadors, the mousse budget is astronomical and the surfaces are very smooth. But when Commander Sinclair defies orders to keep the peace, Londo is the only one who doesn’t believe his nephew’s hostage video. Why isn’t there more science fiction tv? What’s the steel-to-person ratio of Babylon 5? How does a Star Trek podcast stay cool as hell? It’s the episode that’s banking sick voice!

When Voyager gets hit by a chronometric banger, no one but Chakotay can move from shard to shard. But when he takes bun Janeway hostage and starts rebuilding her a bathtub, Seska stands in the way of restoring the correct timeline. Does Darwin the dog have a favorite movie? What makes a holiday puzzle diabolical? Who on the ship needs really good spatial reasoning? It’s the episode that has Kazon nostalgia!

When Admiral Paris cons Brody out of the Caribbean and back onto his own ship, there are fewer majestic shots than you’d expect from Star Trek in the sea. But when a disgraced former captain joins George the Dog in a plot for revenge, only a talking dolphin can save the ship from rebel attack. Who is the Argyle of SeaQuest? What does Darwin keep in his dopp kit? Is there a dress code on the Delta 4 sub? It’s the episode that’s still rocking appendix!

When the Mornhammered continues and Dr. Mark is in deep, his poor judgement with the holos puts BLT at risk. But when Iden starts going from candle store to cult leader, the Doc Kivas Fajos him for yet another disciplinary conversation with Captain Janeway. What’s the hydroxychloroquine of the Biden administration? Is there anything worse than flesh-colored tights? Does Paramount+ do anything well? It’s the episode that finally repays the long lost Coco-no-no!

When Jesse Thorn joins Ben and Adam to relive a conversation with P-Stew, the intro runs almost as long as the interview itself. But when foundational SNL sketches differ, the resulting questions go from glib to sincere and Jesse offers up remote pod viewing directly into his adolescence. If NPR is Godzilla, what is PRI? Where do public radio and Star Trek align? What’s the weirdest thing about having lunch with Jesse? It’s the episode that fantasizes about a very elderly man’s workout routine.

When Dr. Mark gets swiped by a group of social holo-justice warriors, their vision for living free from Hirogen harassment puts him on the lookout for volleyball and colloidal silver. But when a double-barrel episode of Voyager proves too much for one Mornhammered episode to contain, Greatest Gen history gets made live on videotape. Which type of drink never gives head? Why aren’t all Hirogens ten feet tall? What’s the most important rule about yoga wear? It’s the episode that hasn’t remembered anything in fifteen years!

When Ben and Adam need to Q their A’s, Adam Ragusea stops by the pod to lend a hand. But when the trio wants Bonita Applebum and instead they get Apples and Bananas, it looks like things may be off to a rocky start. Where has Kevin been hiding all these years? Is it crenellation or castellation? Does Instacart deliver to the D quad? It’s the episode that asks “What did you think of that?”

When Harry Kim talks his way into command of baby’s first away mission, his Nick Burns approach to management is doing no one any favors. But when Icheb misunderstands BLT’s interest in rock climbing for romance, he tries to let her down easy after blowing up his scanner in a very steamy Jeffries tube. Do starship windows have emergency levers? Who isn’t taking advantage of the luxury of cilantro? What’s the best part of making lasagne? It’s the episode that’s hitting all the low notes!