this post was submitted on 13 Sep 2023
240 points (99.6% liked)

internet funeral

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 year ago

Obviously God's intention was to grant us all a feature whose physical beauty and grandeur can only be truly, authentically enjoyed by another person. Remain humble in the knowledge that even the most glorious ass in the world was never meant to be witnessed by it's owner.

This is the best evidence I've yet heard for a thoughtful God, not a cruel one.

Dismantle the bomb.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago

“I looked at my asshole in the mirror the other day… It blew my fucking mind.”

-Adam Sandler

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Real talk though I'm upset that i can't just walk around myself when I'm trying on outfits. Those mirrors in the fitting room that let you see yourself from several angles are so useful and i want them in my room.

My gf has mirrors on either side of her bed. We're both girls and we look hot asf together. Sometimes i look in the mirror and think it's a shame that we're the only two who get to enjoy the view.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I’d give my life for people like you, friend.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

How about saving a life ? A kitten from the local shelter, a little friend to watch with you youtube videos and to cherish and love forever ! Just a suggestion, friend.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I already have two rescue pets.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Then you are already blessed. May your two pets live a lengthy and healthy life !

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Where is my universe noclip so I can observe myself from all angles? Why can't I access the developer console of life? How can a loving god cause such agony?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Astral projection is your friend

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago

Oh man, this hits me right in the funeral.