this post was submitted on 13 Sep 2024
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The surgeon general has a new public health warning. And this time, the hazard isn’t tobacco or alcohol: it’s parenting. 

Two-fifths of parents say that on most days, “they are so stressed they cannot function,” the Office of the Surgeon General reports in an advisory titled Parents Under Pressure. Roughly half of parents term that stress “completely overwhelming.” 

Those dire findings anchor a 35-page report, released in late August, that posits parental stress as “an urgent public health issue.” It draws on data from the American Psychological Association and other sources to build a case that parents are facing more stress than at perhaps any other time in recent history.

One-third of parents with children under 18 rate their stress level as 8 or higher on a 10-point scale, according to psychological association data. Two-fifths of parents report being “so stressed they feel numb.” Three-fifths say stress makes it hard to focus. Two-thirds are consumed by money woes.

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[–] [email protected] 43 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I mean, yeah, that makes sense. Financial issues have reached critical mass these last few years, especially with the post-COVID inflation surge. Supporting a family off a single income is pretty much just an urban legend at this point; you can't support a single child off DUAL income if you both work normal jobs.

And that's BEFORE we get into the growing societal issues about children having good spaces to play outside, being encouraged to play and interact with each other, constant republican attacks on the education system, and the looming threat of school shootings.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago

And childcare costs more than housing for a lot of families with multiple young kids.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I’ve truly never understood why people unthinkingly have children and then suffer them. The default should not be yes, it should be that you prove to yourself that it is an appropriate thing to do.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Reproduction is as basic an instinct as it gets. Humans are not robots. Rationality does not win out against instinct the vast majority of the time.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (2 children)

And yet rationality is the defining characteristic of humanity.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

Maybe in a theoretical sense. In a practical, everyday sense not so much.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

I'd change that to the capacity for rationality.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

We know………………….we know.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

Parasites tend to do that to their host...

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Awesome! I needed this

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Maybe it's just being alive is bad for your health? I don't even have kids and I'm terminally stressed out.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

You'd be more stressed with kids. That is not at all saying your life is easy now though.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

Think of kids as a stress multiplier. Whatever your stress level is, kids will 2-10x it.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

Yep all true. It's tough and parents are expected to just make it happen. A couple years ago the kid tax credit went up to help familes and instantly the daycare montly rate when up, so it didnt amount to anything.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

So now when people ask why I don't want kids, I can tell them it's for heath reasons!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I fucking love my kid. She's incredible. And some days I kind of understand where Casey Anthony was coming from. Doesn't sound so outlandish. But outside of extreme cases, I probably cap out at about a 6.5/10. I feel like that's pretty good. It's those 8s and up that get you thinking about Casey Anthony.

(since people are increasingly unable to detect satire, I should probably get ahead of it and specify I don't actually fantasize about killing my kid)

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

We have an awful time trying to handle our kids... I definitely understand that. Like right now, it's about to be bedtime, and as I am writing this, they are screaming and running around like mad men. On top of this dealing with all the issues they may have is also extra stress, like how my 1 kid has a few learning disabilities and trying to navigate all that without time or money to throw at it is extra exhausting. The one thing I like to think that is opposite of this article is that I sometimes think because I have to care for them may be the only reason I am still alive! It gives you purpose, whether you wanted it or not! Still I really really can't wait until they grow up a bit and this stage of craziness stops. I will probably regret this when it comes, but I am ready for the emotional teenager phase.