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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Sharp_Dimension_1141 on 2023-09-02 13:11:08.
My wife’s father has surgery scheduled soon. I’m going with my wife to my in-laws’ place to help out, drive to and from the hospital etc. I’ll be staying there for about a week, until he’s released from the hospital and comes back home. But the full recovery time for the surgery is 6-8 weeks to three months.
I’m also switching jobs around this time so have managed to take a few weeks off. I booked a 1.5 week international trip, scheduled to leave about 4 weeks after the surgery. I knew my wife couldn’t come/wouldn’t want to so I picked a destination I knew she didn’t have any interest in going to.
My wife freaked out at me, saying it was completely inconsiderate for me to even consider going anywhere at a time like this.
Obviously I’d cancel the trip if there are any complications or anything, but I’m spending a week or more helping out around the time of the surgery (their home is also several hours from ours) and I thought going on a trip nearly a month after the surgery wouldn’t be unreasonable. AITA?
EDIT: I did mention to my wife I was planning to book a trip before I did say. She didn’t really say anything and then now (about a week later) is when she really blew up at me and said she didn’t appreciate it.
SECOND EDIT: International travel is pretty common for us — we usually take 1-2 very nice international trips every year, so this is not a once in a lifetime type trip I’m going on alone.