this post was submitted on 26 May 2024
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[–] [email protected] 47 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (2 children)

They're not warm blooded. Maybe they're flamingos.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 5 months ago (1 children)

And they produce dairy-free milk, whereas mammal milk is definitely of the dairy variety.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Is human milk a dairy product?

[–] [email protected] 14 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Human milk certainly contains Lactose and Whey Protein.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago (1 children)

But is it a dairy product?

[–] [email protected] 15 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I just gave you a pretty succinct definition of Dairy. Yes.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Google shows conflicting answers and the Wikipedia page doesn't list human milk.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Well if you go by FDA's Title 21 Chapter I Subchapter B Part 131 Subpart B then not only is human milk not a dairy product but the only animal who produces milk is a cow, however in 2018 they requested submissions weighing in on whether plant products should continue to use "dairy group" words such as milk and yogurt on their labeling, so I think there is probably some leeway on this.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago

the only animal who produces milk is a cow

Some kids are gonna go hungry, no goats milk for ewes.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago (1 children)

And we all know how trustworthy Google Search is...

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

Not actually using Google, just using it as a generic term for search.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Yes, but it's pretty difficult to buy.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago (1 children)

It's not actually especially difficult. People who produce more than their kid needs will sell or give away the extra to people who are struggling to produce enough. Also... Some hardcore body builders buy it as well.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

There's apparently also breastmilk ice-cream!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

Also, beware the diseases. Milk can spread virus AFAIK.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (2 children)

They’re not warm blooded.

depends on the climate. natural habitat: yes. grocery store: no.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 months ago (1 children)

By definition, "warm blooded" means "produce their own heat" (obviously drastically simplified). I don't think it matters whether the coconut is on a deserted island or on the shelf at Woollies, it's still not warm blooded.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 5 months ago (1 children)

What if it's on fire, using it's own energy to produce the heat?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago

As I'm burning I'm the happiest I've ever been. I'm finally mammal.

-the coconut

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

I mean, that sounds like poikilothermy to me

[–] [email protected] 21 points 5 months ago (2 children)

They don’t secrete a filtered blood derived substance through modified sweat glands, thus not milk producing, nearly milk substitute producing.

Wild thought, vampires that drink milk instead of blood.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 5 months ago

you mean like human babies?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago
[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Neither Coconuts nor Oats have Mammary Exocrine Glands

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

I heard that in Sheldon Coopers voice.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 months ago

Behold, a man!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 months ago (1 children)

You can milk any animal that has nipples... but, do coconuts have nipples?!

I rest my case 😎

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

Is not about the nips, but the mammary glands.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 months ago (3 children)

Mammals aren't "living organisms with fur and milk". They're "the most recent common ancestor of the echidna and the cat, and anything descended from that".

[–] [email protected] 10 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Whoa, so cats came from coconuts?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Then why are there still coconuts? Check mate atheists

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago

Proof that humans and coconuts lived together. Suck it science!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago

You can milk a cat, that checks out.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago (1 children)

echidna I understand, but why cat?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago

The actual definition is "monotremes and placental mammals". I just picked one of each.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 months ago

Nah, coconuts don't have the right kind of teeth and ear bones.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago

While "having fur and producing milk" may have been the original description of mammals, biology no longer classifies things that way.

Today, all of the classification is based on Clades, which can be established by doing DNA investigation (similarity matching). So, "mammals" are defined as a clade. And whether somebody falls into it or not depends on their DNA similarity. And coconut clearly do not belong into there.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago

Geez I thought we left the coconut fuckers back at the place which may not be named.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago

In this essay I will

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

coconuts are plants and you're an idiot

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago (2 children)

you’re an idiot

Name-calling isn't nice. Remember to be(e) nice at Beehaw. Consider this a warning.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

But "idiot" isn't a name, i guess?

/jk Sorry, I'll show myself out.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

gasp!

[ clutches pearls ]

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

Vegans hate this one weird trick

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago