this post was submitted on 13 May 2024
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The Onion

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The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

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[–] [email protected] 90 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (2 children)

How are we supposed to know what is real and what is fake anymore. The onion was supposed to be the line of, “this is too absurd to happen,” But now it’s just six months from now.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 6 months ago

Like, I laughed so hard at this, not because it’s even funny, but because I couldn’t tell if it was real.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago

…especially in Florida.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Thanks, this makes me feel way better about eating the onion here.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I ate the onion long enough to click into the article. Damn Florida

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

I know, this one is so plausibly something those psychos in the various school board across the fucked-up state of Florida would actually do, I honestly thought this was real for a moment.

They have already shut down entire school libraries, and censored several other public libraries, and are trying to make it illegal to speak freely about slavery or genocide or generally being critical of the US or the glorious military. And there is no shortage of 100% serious, 100% unironic talk ("protected free speech") among ordinary Florida folk about how the slaves actually had it pretty good since they never had to worry about paying for rent or food, and anyone could have done the unskilled labor they did, "I mean, they never had human rights, but what would ~~animals~~ I mean black folk want with those."

I mean, this Onion headline is really, really plausibly real, and might even become real pretty soon.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 6 months ago

Help! My doll has demanded rights!!!

[–] [email protected] 14 points 6 months ago

Oh wow. I ate the onion on this one lmao

[–] [email protected] 12 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

This reminds me of the Bob's Burgers episode where they mention giving Gene a goldfish to see if he was responsible enough to have a dog.

Gene's conclusion: "I was not."

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago

Sounds kinky...