this post was submitted on 03 May 2024
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B Movie Bonanza

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Okay, it probably doesn’t really qualify because it’s; new, high-budget, directed by Zac Snyder, etc. But hear me out. This hot mess starts with space-nazis vs space-vikings, takes a turn through Star Wars, Oceans Eleven, space-Rome, and a few tropes that defy easy space-hyphenation.

To say the plot makes almost no sense would be generous. I’m loathed to spoil the greater arc here, but the plot does hinge on a village on the edge of space being forced to harvest grain in order to feed a passing army… there’s probably a Kurosawa reference here somewhere, but good movies just aren’t my jamb so I wouldn’t know ;-)

As I stare at the frozen credits at the end of part two and contemplate my life I have to note that there must actually have been footage cut from this movie (you’ll understand if you watch it) because they credit a Snake Wrangler!

So, if you have 4-5 hours of free time this weekend, a Netflix account you haven’t already cancelled, and are allergic to nice weather, I humbly submit, for your consideration: Rebel Moon parts I & II.

………. (All the periods I probably should have used)

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago (2 children)

I respect the argument, but hard disagree.

B-movies by definition are low-budget, which means not a lot of money for production (e.g. sets, costumes, good actors, cinematography, etc.) A "good" B-movie will be worth watching because there will be something charming or outrageous in it, usually because the movie is not blandly and unimaginatively targeted for success as most of the first-tier movies.

The Rebel Moon movies had a large budget, which means they have great sets, costumes, actors, and cinematography. However, there is nothing charming in them because they are blandly and unimaginatively targeted for success (and fail!)

B-movies can be fun to watch and listen to and interact with, e.g. talking about them as in MST3K. The Rebel Moon movies are NO fun to watch and listen to, and the best way to play them is in the background, with the sound off and some music on instead, while you do something else.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

That’s entirely fair, it’s a stretch at best.

I think it’s hard to find a modern movie that really has that special charm. There are few hidden gems that don’t cater to some specific fetish. “Independent” means a modest 20 million dollar budget… I’m not a huge fan of the made to be campy genre — Zombeavers was good though.

They definitely never picked a lane with any of there design language. It seemed like someone just went though and made a list of all the stuff they thought was cool form the last 20 years. In one scene you have people fighting with laser rifles, laser swords, and regular axes.

Somewhere in the second half of production they decide that you really have no reason to care about anyone, so everyone gets a full 5-10 min backstory all back-to-back. Large portions of the plots could be randomly replaced without significantly altering the flow of the movie… and it does briefly feature muscular shirtless men riding huge eagles. Turn down the terrible plot and add some prog-rock and you’ve got a rock opera? ;-)

I think it would make a decent rifftrax movie, it’s got enough nonsense and long dramatic pauses. But yeah, I certainly wouldn’t put it one with a bunch of friends more than once… and a proper B movie keeps giving :-)

I’m going for a proper classic next time. Anyone seen Class of 1999?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

"Great sets"? How high are you? The whole damn thing was green-screened. I don't mind some, but what the actual fuck.🖕🏽

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I hate that Snyder makes a bad version to release an allegedly better one later. I'm not going to watch either, thanks.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Like with this movie specifically? Or he’s got a pattern? Because you could cut hours out of this and still have a serviceable plot.

I can’t really blame you. I think 300 was good, everything else was kinda meh.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

He announced a special cut of this one some days ago, but I really mean his stuff generally, at least from the last few years. Everything is released twice.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

I’m going to have to watch an interview someday… some measure of excess ego is required to be a Hollywood director, but doing anything with this other than just cashing the paycheck seems wholly delusional ;-)

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I agree. Part One was OK if your expectations are super low.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

I figured it would have some cool slow-mo spear chucking, I was not disappointed.

Honestly they are already starting to run together, but I think there were 3 of them in the first movie alone.