Ask Lemmy

Airedale Terrier. I tried to fuck one during a psychotic episode.

Yeah greyhounds look weird but they're the sweetest dumbest most loving buddies

I don't like dogs (except Huskies), because they often bark so sudden and loud. It seems they only have one volume setting for barking. I mean, they are cute and all, but one day they're gonna give me a heart attack.

I'm scared of horses because their mouth is in their nose and I find it creepy with their huge teeth.💀

I think it's weird to dislike animals. Unless you've been terrorised by one I guess (dogs, geese etc)

Wombats: their turds are cube shaped and it's against the laws of nature.

Lamprey, I am not really a sucker for them

I am scared of and hate most birds but ones with long necks REALLY freak me out. Geese, swans, flamingoes, fuck those creepy stretch-neck horror movie monsters.

On the opposite end of the spectrum, love a kiwi bird. Lil dudes just be fuzzy, run around, and eat bugs. Rock on kiwi birds

I will be forever scarred by not one but two duck gang rapes I witnessed. The second one involved them raping another male duck to death, presumably because all the females were hiding as far away as they could. Absolute bastards.

Sloths and praying mantis' can fuck right off, they give me the creeps!

Cats: I had one that peed through three different couches

Domestic cats. Partly because they poop in my garden, but mostly because they're secretly planning to take over the whole world and enslave the human race.

Pandas. They're stupid stupid animals that wouldn't exist if it weren't for the millions spent on them that would go better spent on animals that want to live.

Sloths. They have evil smiles and knife fingers.

Lampreys. I know they're probably not sitting under the sand, just waiting for me so they can feast on my feet... but it still gives me pause every time I go to the beach

I'm definitely on the hate apes train, Chimpanzees in particular. They're not cute and are freakishly strong and I think it's insane some people keep them as pets.

Canadian geese... the damn cobra chickens are ridiculously protective, strong, loud, and grumpy. In Michigan, you just can't avoid them. They're everywhere and in the thousands. I've been attacked, my dogs have been attacked, they poop everywhere, and their wings are strong enough to break bones. I do not like the cobra chicken.

I dislike any animal large enough to one hit me by accident.

Outside of that hairless cats look like living ball sacks.

Skunks. I have an irrational fear of them. I don’t understand their purpose, they’re ugly and smell disgusting. Shocking that there is in fact an animal that smells worse.