The original post: /r/amitheasshole by /u/Formal-Suggestion841 on 2024-05-19 11:57:16.
I (28f) am pretty much estranged from my sister. I don't have her number nor she mine, we're not social media friends, we don't know where the other lives and we don't invite each other into our lives at all. She didn't invite me to her wedding and before the party she had never seen my kids (though she still never interacted with them which I'd prefer). The only time we ever see each other is when it concerns our grandparents. I don't have much to do with my parents either. But my grandparents are different.
My grandparents had an informal party to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary and we all went. My partner of 13 years and our three kids were there. My sister was also there with her husband. At some point during the party my sister came up to me and started berating me for using two of her favorite names for my children. I still don't know for sure which ones I used that she would have wanted but I think it might have been the names of my two daughters. My only reason for the assumption is when we weren't estranged she'd only ever talk about having daughters. But we never talked about this and I never knew about baby names she might or might not like. We were already estranged when I was pregnant with my first so it never came up. She told me it was disgusting and I should change them because she's struggling with infertility and deserves to use the names when her baby finally comes. I told her she had no right to throw around demands. And I said I was not going to rename my 5 and 3 year olds for her.
I walked away and attempted to avoid a scene but she followed me to berate me some more. She called me inconsiderate and accused me of acting out of spite. Yet again I tried walking away but to no avail. She grew louder and I knew a scene was about to start so I apologized to my grandparents and then I left with my family.
After the party I got a text from a couple of aunts and uncles scolding me for walking out and also sharing messages my parents had sent them about it where I was accused of ruining my grandparents celebration. I also got screenshots of my sister's thoughts as well. They said I was very childish and hurtful walking away from my sister but also for abandoning my grandparents.
My grandparents understood and they're not angry but it's wearing on me a little what those aunts and uncles are saying plus the screenshots of what my parents and sister are saying. And I didn't want to leave. I felt it was for the best. But now I'm doubting myself and I may have made it worse the next time my sister and I are in the same room.
AITA?