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Scandinavian Broken English Quiz, Part 1 — can you figure out the intended meanings of these sentences? (hexbear.net)

submitted 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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Swedish politician: "Ladies and gentlemen, I welcome to this technical mess."

Answer

NO/DK messe SE mässa = 'trade fair', cognate with EN mass in the Christian sense

Norwegian at an international conference: "I am sorry, this microphone smells each time I speak."

Answer

NO smelle SE smälla = 'to make a loud noise, to bang or slam etc'

Ole Einar Bjørndalen: "Maybe we can invite him over to our hotel, we have a really good cock with us."

Answer

NO kokk DE kok SE kock = 'cook', cognate with EN cook via PWG *kok

These next few all come from our beloved Petter Solberg:

"It's not the fart that kills you, it's the smell."

Answer

NO/DK/SE fart = 'speed', NO smell SE smäll = 'bang'

"I had bad pigs in my deck."

Answer

NO/SE pigg DK pig = 'spike, barb, quill, prickle' NO dekk DK dæk SE däck = 'tyre', cognate with EN deck via Middle Dutch dec ※NO piggdekk refers to studded tyres

"It was a moose in the engine."

Answer

NO/DK/SE mus = 'mouse', cognate with EN mouse via PGmc *mūs whereas EN moose derives from Proto-Algonquian *mo·swa, lit. "it strips [i.e. the bark off trees]"

"It was so much dog on the window."

Answer

NO dogg or dugg DK dug SE dagg = 'dew', cognate with EN dew via PGmc *dawwą

"The rat is loose! The rat is loose!"

Answer

NO/SE ratt DK rat = 'steering wheel', ultimately related to English words like rotor via PIE *Hreth₂- 'to run'

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago (1 children)

"It's not the fart that kills you, it's the smell."

Lmao this rocks. Is Petter known to be a bit of a jokester?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago

As far as I'm aware he's never deliberately said these types of quotes, but I am also certain that he knows it's what he's famous for.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago (1 children)

The moose and cock ones I have heard before.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

I'm surprised it's those you've heard before, "it's not the fart" is in my experience by far the most famous of these quotes.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

Swedish politician: "Ladies and gentlemen, I welcome to this technical mess."

Answer: I welcome you this terrible mess?

Norwegian at an international conference: "I am sorry, this microphone smells each time I speak."

Answer: This microphone fails each time I speak

Ole Einar Bjørndalen: "Maybe we can invite him over to our hotel, we have a really good cock with us."

Answer: "cook" not "cock"

These next few all come from our beloved Petter Solberg:

"It's not the fart that kills you, it's the smell."

Answer:

(English sentence?)

"I had bad pigs in my deck."

Answer: I had bad pics of my dick

"It was a moose in the engine."

Answer: "smoke" not moose?

"It was so much dog on the window."

Answer: "There was so much dogs on the window"

"The rat is loose! The rat is loose!"

Answer:

(Yeah you can't put actual English sentences like that and fool me?)

Edit: on second thoughts, these are matters of etymology, gosh dang it... even Scottish ppl sound more coherent than this mess....