this post was submitted on 31 Mar 2024
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Hello everyone,

This is regarding Keris, also known as RiikkaTheIcePrincess. Link to the previous post.

The last post that I made about Keris got a lot of engagement. She was able to get some financial help and other support, which was great, however their housing situation is still non-existent. The person who offered to let them stay in a couple of weeks fell through, so they have nowhere to go. Keris did make it safely to Minneapolis and is staying in a hotel until Monday. That means that they need a place to stay ASAP.

They really, really, need a place to stay while they search for a job. This is the thing that they most need right now. If anybody in the Minneapolis area has a spare bed, couch, or floor for her to sleep on, that would be a lifesaver. Seriously. Even if it's just for a week or a few days, it would be a huge help and would keep them off the streets for the time being while they figure things out and get back on their feet.

I understand that this isn't the usual type of content on this community, but it's a very time sensitive thing. There are projects in the works to assist future people who are in need on here, but for now this is all there is.

Keris said that she greatly appreciates everyone who has helped out with advice, support, resources, and donations so far.

Edit: Read her comment below for some corrections and clarifications.

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (3 children)

Hi, I just now got a functioning wifi connection (laptop only, hotel's wifi is weird somehow) so I'm sortof a little bit backish for a day or two. Thanks to everycritter who helped in any way, whether it's being aggressively friendly or sending money or offering to help me get work or whatever. Everything's rough lately, trying to go through things on my phone, trying to keep food in, trying to stop freaking out long enough to actually do anything.

So. Kinda barely-here but I feel like I wanna say, I think the instability is what's been crushing me worst. Everything has a cost and I can't really process that even when I'm not completely wrecked. Hotel for a week can cost as much money as rent for a month. Can't rent, though, because that needs provable, stable income (hahahahahaha just have a safe, stable life and you can have a safe, stable life. What's the problem?) and a year-long lease (because committing to staying a year in a freaky crowdy grungy bigass city in some random spot about which I know nothing is a great idea). Even picking a hotel is stressy. Is it safe? Am I gonna get robbed by the staff, or attacked in the lobby? Is it gonna be hard to get to or from it? Can I afford it for long enough? Am I gonna understand how to use this booking? What if I'm supposed to have a non-expired licence? Mine expired ages ago.
Fun trivia you get a special checkup by the TSA if you drop by with an expired licence! They swabbed my freaking plushies. Me just standing there like "Ah yeah, must be part of the manhunt for the Great Plushie Bomber of Tulsa" 😅 Like what?
Anyway every single thing comes with a dozen costs, many impossible to quantify. Spoons go quick. Phone calls take a lot of them. Point is, it's hard to plan to have anything left. I could get a hotel room for a couple weeks and have nothing left for food, or for leaving if someone somewhere else can keep/save me. Maybe somewhere more manageable @.@ Or for getting some actual walking shoes. Should've done that instead of fresh flats. I'm kindof an idiot even on a good day, maybe.

How do these get so long? What am I yapping about? Something something it's too damn hard to figure anything out because everything else is in the way and every action comes with a bunch of costs that can independently conflict with any other action. So I just fall apart and nothing happens because, turns out, stressing itself costs spoons. ... And that costs time, which was the problem to begin with, just it's worse now.

I've probably said most of this before. Sorry, I'm half-asleep and hungry. Think I have a dinner date with the vending machine 'cause my feet aren't looking to go any farther than that 😅 Also not sure I wanna be wandering around at night here, at least not yet. Oh yeah, and it's midnight. Most people aren't up at midnight, let alone running foodplaces. Oh well 🤷 No fridge in here or I'd have some leftovers to eat >:| Also I have no idea how I'm in a state where I might be able to actually do an eat without promptly doing an un-eat 🤔 Maybe because I'm asleep @.@

Anyway, hello. Happy Transgender Day of Visibility. Against all sense and my best interests I'm still around for it. Will probably go somewhere and be visible I suppose. I think I wanted to say something else but I forgot. If anycritter remembers what it was, please let me know 😅

Edit to clarify:

  1. I'll go anywhere, Minneapolis is just where I am now. (Also it's terrifying. I'd thought Tulsa was reasonably big, and O'Hare airport crowded 😅 )
  2. Idunno if "fell through" is exactly right. Could be he's focused on getting me my own place. Or he's got issues having anyone in his house. Or I said something oddly or wrongly and he's reacting to that. I just mean... basically I was hoping he represented stability but then it kinda hit me that he didn't seem to have the same idea aaaand I kinda [redacted] in my mouth a lil and couldn't eat the dinner he'd bought me. So it's not "He said I could stay with him but then backed out," which I worry is what somecritter(s) may read 😓 More like, he said that'd be a possibility if I could make it to the 17th and I... Idunno, maybe just imagined hopes I didn't have, honestly. Was kinda seeing that as my start point, which is maybe kinda ridiculous considering that'd be twenty days of just/mostly recovery, orientation, maybe exploring, maybe just waiting (whether waiting to have a (temp) address for something, or whatever).
[–] [email protected] 11 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I feel real bad that I can't help you with a place to stay, especially now that the arrangement you had fell through. I'm glad you got here safe though and I hope you can find a living arrangement soon! If you ever need someone to talk to I'm pretty much always available. Also if you need a reference for a job I'd be happy to help you out with that.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Idunno if "fell through" is exactly right. Hard to anything, so things get confused before I even say them @.@ Thanks, though.

What kinda job? Where? Maybe PM or contact elsewhere if you don't wanna discuss that publicly @.@ Though, not to be an ingrate or whatever but Idunno if I'm ready to be moving around much right now so... basically just having some stability of shelter is my entire priority list now. ... Well, that and figuring out how to get some proper walking shoes I can bring myself to wear with my outfits 😅 Let's pretend that's completely joke and no also partly social fear of getting bad reactions over my clothes <.<; Anyway, aside from my legs and feet hurting pretty bad I'm also still terrified of going out into this freaky-ass city 😅 So actually committing to making myself sick over the stuff other than just having somewhere to stay is for later I think.

By which I mean, please-and-thank-you but no promises right-immediately-now @.@;

Why can't I make a post or comment under essay-length any more 🤔 🤷

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I meant like when the job application wants you to put people as a reference. You can lie and put me as a coworker or manager and if they call me I'll tell them that you're a really good worker, etc, etc.

I'm also unemployed rn so I don't have specific job to refer you to, but whatever job you do end up finding I am comfortable with you putting me down as a reference. Just DM me whenever you need it and I'll give you my name and number to put on the application.

Why can't I make a post or comment under essay-length any more 🤔 🤷

I think you're stressed out and since you don't have anyone to talk to irl right now you're venting in your posts/comments. Which there's nothing wrong with that, especially given your situation. If you need someone to talk to you can DM me whenever and I'm local (I live about 45 minutes away from the cities), so if you wanted to hang out we could; maybe when you're more stable since you're in survival mode right now and it's more important to focus on finding work/shelter/food right now.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Oooo, okay! Thanks. Also, yeah sure we should hang out sometime :3 Meeting new friends is nice. Even managed to wiggle a little! Looks like I've probably got a place to stay for a week or two, and I kinda have friends now!? Super weird. Maybe I can survive escaping 🤔 😅

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

I'm very happy your situation is improving. :3 Yeah it'd be nice to hang out some day!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 7 months ago (1 children)

The ADHD is hitting, so I fully admit I just skimmed your posts. If I'm missing something, please let me know.

I will reach out to some of my contacts to see if I can find someone close by. I'm in Minneapolis myself (Nicollet Island/Northeast, close to Otter's Saloon), but I've got < 600 sqft and a mess that can only be explained as a fun combo of depression and ADHD. It isn't ideal, but worst case scenario I can possibly put you up for a couple of nights (no promises, but I'll try).

Message me on here or on Discord (omgitburns) and I'll see how I can help.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

Thanks muchly! Looks like I've likely got a place for the next week or two :3 A start!

Thanks again for the offer, though <3

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I can barely remember what I'm thinking let alone other folks 😅 my allergies have been kicking my ass for most of the last couple days and brain no worky well when you can't really breath properly. Starting to feel better this afternoon

Weirdly one of the benefits of larger cities (or so I've heard) is things being open later, but that may have changed from covid.

How are you feeling about not being in oklahoma? Obviously everything else about this is going to be extremely stressful, but having a bit of space to not keep your eyes over your shoulder (or on ear open from headphones) can feel... different.

I moved out (under good circumstances) a little over 3 years ago and I'm only starting to actually keep both sides of headphones/earbuds on my head in the past few months, I think the some of the hyper-awareness is permanent tho (like keeping my back in corners, having an exit in sight, etc)

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

Hm, not being in Oklahoma... Not really caring much. More-local stuff has been taking up all' my mind-space so I'm not feeling much about larger-scale stuff. Maybe that'll come. Doesn't really feel a whole lot different but I haven't really been anywhere. I think I'd see a bit less variety in accents and skin colours in OK, and probably have met someone grossed out seeing me.

Oh, on that note I'm declaring vendetta against Denver's airport. It's one big, horrible line and I had to walk the entire thing (minus several linear-escalator-thing trips) and people were staring at me the entire time. Screw that place! Down with DEN! Boooooo! 👻!

Actually I'm more afraid of here than of Tulsa. Never rode a bus there. Don't think they have light rail. ... Full of smokers. 😡 Guess I kinda stayed to wherever I was and wherever I was going? 🤷 Also the place just feels less big and scary, even downtown with the towers 😅

I actually kinda hesitate to consider myself a proper trans-refugee because I didn't really have that bad there. Problems were "family" and my own broken mental state. A handful of mean looks over a decade just isn't what most trans people suffer that makes others wanna run, I think 🤷 Not that I want to deal with that. If I had to live in DEN I'd be living with the TSA real quick 😅

[–] [email protected] 17 points 7 months ago (2 children)

I'm a middle-aged married cis guy up in Duluth. If things get extremely desperate we have a spare bedroom.

Not ideal. Not Minneapolis.

But supportive, safe, and available.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Thanks much! I don't even care where, really. Can still afford to fly again, if I have to. I just need a start that isn't "get your whole life sorted by the end of the week or enjoy the street." I'll try not to pester you unless it's that or the street.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Wouldn't be pestering at all. We've got the room and have always talked about letting someone use it who is in a bad spot.

I'd been reading these messages, keeping you in mind and when this one came up I talked to my wife and she agreed. (I'm from Minneapolis originally and she has friends down there, but we couldn't think of who would have room.)

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Oh, that's very not Minneapolis 😅 Okay I guess I see a sub-optimality there. No telling what if anything is going on in my brain these days.

On the other paw, it looks far less terrifying than Minneapolis 😅

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Yup, we are a bit further north. But it's an option if things fall apart down in Minneapolis.

A little more context, my wife and I are self-diagnosed neurodivergent DINKS with five cats and two dogs.

Our house has a fenced yard right on the bus line in a walkable neighborhood. And we know plenty of left-minded younger people in town.

And if you're from rural Oklahoma, Duluth is a little more your speed than Minneapolis. We somehow kept a small town feel.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

poke poke Please still exist <.<;

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Did you get my PM/DM/message thingle? ... Kinda feeling like I'm getting another silent nope here :-\

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

I did not! My client doesn't notify me of those things. I replied using the web instead of my app. We are still an option. Ran it by my wife again when I saw your message.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago (2 children)

I only know two people in Duluth. Justin, is that you???

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Your comment probably should have been a private message instead.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago

It's a joke. While I do know someone named Justin in Duluth, there is also a college campus with 10,000 Justins too.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago