The original post: /r/amitheasshole by /u/absurdwatermelon_1 on 2024-05-07 14:00:51.
At the beginning of spring semester, I noticed my psych teacher says the phrase "do you see what I'm sayin'" a LOT. I started counting on the second day of classes, and after a few days I planned to present him with my findings at the end of the semester.
We were talking about Freud stuff the first week so with the amount of times he said the word "motherlover" I assumed he'd enjoy laughing at himself.
Well yesterday I presented him with my findings. I'll admit I kind of blindsided him in front of the whole class, first saying I just needed to talk to him but once he agreed changing to saying I had a "presentation." The class laughed at my slides a bit bit I didn't realize that the teacher wasn't until the end.
In my data, there was a clear and dramatic drop in early February, and I attempted to explain that as either 1) something happened inside or outside of school that affected his mood negatively, as he seemed to say it more when he was more energetic, or 2) he learned that he didn't like our class.
This was the first instance of him getting defensive, saying he "gives what he gets back out of a class" and how "we're apathetic so he returned that energy." I agreed with him, and said he basically confirmed my second point (did he not?)
Anyways, I didn't notice and finished my presentation. When I was done, I asked "any questions? What do you think?" He just stared at me for a moment and this is when I first realized he was pissed. I apologized and said "do you feel attacked? I wasn't trying to make fun, I thought you'd laugh" I realize phrasing it that way may have seemed sarcastic.
He proceeded to tear apart the concept, saying it was "unethical," "a breach of trust," and "morally wrong." He went on to say he was "making judgements about my moral character" and that "this would never get past an ethics board."
I apologized again and admitted I shouldn't have blindsided him, but he just said I should've asked permission.
I apologized once more and he said "no, don't apologize, it's really cool. Good work here. Just get out."
Both of our tones the whole time were very professional but just thinking about the way he told me to get out made me sick. That was about 24 hours ago, and now I have to see him in class pretty soon.
I've been thinking about it for a long time and yeah, I definitely should've gotten permission. I didn't because I thought that'd make it funnier, and that it would've affected the data. But hindsight makes me think I should've asked.
I told two friends about the ordeal and they both said he's the asshole, but im not sure so I'm here.
AITA?
Edit: The comments seem to be against me and I know they're right. I've apologized to the man a few times already but I'm going to shoot him an email later apologizing again with some of the points brought up in the comments