So I'm at this "luau" party at my brother's school, which we learned about from an email right? This is for 4-7th graders and the email doesn't say anything about being a drop off event or anything. I'm pulling in like 6:01 and it starts at 6, and there's a parade of cars leaving so I think oh shit I have the time wrong right? So I get there and pull up to the door to drop my brother off, he asks me, surprised, if I was just dropping him off, and I said "no I'm going to park and be right in". When I get inside there are kids sitting at a white folding table taking everyone's admission money and handing out leis, and a line of some 20 kids in floral shirts, no adults in sight. I pay and we go in, and I get like 5 sideways glances, one kid who is ostensibly DJing asks me who I am and what I'm doing there, and at the same time the school's art teacher walks up and asks me the same. Clearly I've triggered some alarm bells here or something. I shake his hand and explain that I'm (brother's name)'s brother and that I recognize him from the remote lessons he made during COVID lockdowns. He asks again what I'm doing there and "are you just going to hang out here or..?", and I said, confused, "I'm just here with my brother, where are all the big people? Ha ha"
"Oh looking away, jaw muscles flexing this was set up as more of a drop off pick up thing"
"Oh okay, uh I guess I'll go wait on the car, do you want my lei then?"
"You can just leave it on the table"

So I let my brother know I would be waiting in the car. Look like a dumbass in my floral print shirt and sunglasses and sandals walking back out.

Somehow everyone else picked up on some social cue that I didn't, that it wasn't a family thing. It's like 8-13 year olds and I'm looking over the email and don't see anything suggesting it wasn't a family thing. I would get it if it was a highschool thing. It's 45 minutes drive here and 30 to town so I don't know what I was supposed to do in the interim anyway. I know others probably live closer but where is everyone else going? Sitting here watching a procession of cars drop their kids off with some money and pull away. Not one parent even walking their kids into the building. There have been at least twenty previous events here where everyone did stick around so what's different??

Am I just that fucking out of touch or what? At least fifty other parents/guardians etc somehow realized that it wasn't just unexpected but questionable that someone would go in with their kid/sibling or whatever.

I don't know what that shows about me. I had an ASD diagnosis when I was around 8 but most of the glaring symptoms have gone away. I still get a little hyperfocused on certain things but it isn't physically painful to touch play dough or grass or have my socks not perfectly straight and pulled up, or have sticky hands like it used to be, in fact it doesn't bother me one bit anymore (except that having sticky hands is gross, but not in the way where it's panic inducing). I'm not saying it "went away" or anything, but I certainly wouldn't catch a diagnosis now I don't think, in fact I think I'm generally more insightful about what people are thinking and feeling than most people are, but then something like this happens and I don't know, what's my deficiency that I apparently missed something which was clear as day to at least 50 other people? I don't know. I thought I was going to be sitting at a cafeteria table with 20 parents and guardians right now drinking disgusting punch out of a plastic cup. I'm looking at the email now trying to figure this out but I'm completely lost and apparently look like a creep or something. Our mother didn't get it either, she was planning to come too but couldn't.