this post was submitted on 15 Dec 2023
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[–] [email protected] 129 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (8 children)

This interpretation is valid. But I recently learned to see it a different way.

If you'll humor me, please consider this. Since Santa knows if you've been "bad or good," he knows the other reindeer have been bullies to poor Rudolph. And, while a red glowing nose is cool, it's not a useful fog light. It's just not.

So Santa "uh oh!" had an emergency where, for the first time ever, the fog was going to be too thick all over the world to deliver presents?

Nope, he set up Rudolph in a position to "lead" his peers in a situation that maybe needed a little help but was not, in any way, a true, worldwide magic-assed Santa emergency. Santa knew how to guide his reindeer to accept each other. The story of Rudolph was not about Rudolph doing something to prove himself. It was about recognizing a Rudolph in need and helping him rise to the occasion to bring him closer to his peers in a way that could heal division.

Rudolph isn't about how to triumph as a Rudolph. It's about how to be a good Santa.

(Edit: For everyone who already thought this was obvious in the story, thanks for letting this Rudolph have his epiphany anyway.)

[–] [email protected] 28 points 11 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 25 points 11 months ago

Sudden onset cardiomegaly

[–] [email protected] 24 points 11 months ago (1 children)

The town were assholes and deserved it

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago

Given how far the Grinch’s cave was from the town, that must have been some prestigious noise.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 11 months ago (1 children)

How does SantaBlack boot polish taste?

SMH my head, just another Santapologist trying to twist the narrative.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago

SantaBlack lmao

Is that why he’s impossible to see?

[–] [email protected] 26 points 11 months ago

Live action Rudolph, the novel.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 11 months ago

If Santa didn't give us the opportunity to choose to do good or choose to do bad, how would we earn the chance to live in heaven with Santa for eternity? Santa never gives us more than we can bear, and he works in mysterious ways. Yes, we can come to Santa with our earnest request, but sometimes the answer is no. Remember the abominable snowman is always on the prowl for boys and girls whose faith is weak

[–] [email protected] 12 points 11 months ago

This is actually a very good take imo. Thanks for sharing this.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago

Angry upvote. I've been holding onto the interpretation that Santa was an asshole for knowing nasty shit was going down under his nose, but not doing anything about it until there was something in it for him.

So I'd like to add to the chorus of those who appreciate this wholesome take.

(Santa's still a cunt though 😜 )

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Are we considering the notion that Santa doesn't just know if human children have behaved themselves, but also all ages of various animals too?

Does he know if my goldfish is a dick? Has he ever given anything except coal to a cat? Does he know whether all dogs are good dogs?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I imagine he's like Ghost Rider and can tell with a glance if someone is guilty or not by seeing their soul. If the entity has a soul, then he knows. Goldfish? Probably not. Sapient reindeer? Definitely.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Mr. Bubbles didn't have a soul? 😭

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

(⁠‘⁠◉⁠⌓⁠◉⁠’⁠)⁠\(°-° )

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago

It's so heartwarming to see a non-cynical take on something on the Internet. Thanks!

[–] [email protected] 21 points 11 months ago (1 children)

My theory is they meant the lesson to be learned by santa and the others, through Rudolph, but they focus on him so much that you expect Rudolph to have learned or grown himself. Truth is its santa and the head elf who grow, by realizing that even outcasts have something to offer, and that being cruel is, while morally wrong, just dumb as shit because you might need a glowy reindeer snoot someday, but only if you didn't drive them to run away and die to a snow monster. Or something.

That or they just didn't think it through very well at all. Which is probably more likely. Idk. But it feels a little bit more understandable if you think of Santa as the one with the arc, not rudolph.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Old children's stories were never really about teaching morality. I think there's a German story where some guy goes around killing children who don't eat their vegetables.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago

I think there’s a German story where some guy goes around killing children

Many such cases

[–] [email protected] 14 points 11 months ago

Well yeah.

Jesse Pinkman's life was only spared on Walter's word, yo.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago

I was thinking it's an opportunity for Rudolph to say "If you guys keep fuckin with me, maybe I'll decide to crash this whole team"

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago

You mean a big jolly happy cancer?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

They tell Santa about the misfit toy island and Santa's like oh ho ho! I had no idea, absolutely no idea at all that sentient misfit toys were being shipped to an island. I'd never do that.

<.< . >.>

We'll uh, we'll get some of the less misfit ones some homes, howboutthat? Haha what would you say about being my new LEAD raindeer, eh champ!?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

Oh, so work for the government?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

Jack Johnson has an interesting version of Rudolf that's related here

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

I mean, yeah