Trans

I'm from the deep (very rural) south of the USA. I'm also a white trans man, which means my experiences are gonna be wildly different than that of a person of color, trans woman, or someone from a city.

The general attitude here is "don't ask, don't tell." Mind your own business, don't make a fuss (aka fight for human rights or injustices), and keep your head down and most people won't give you trouble. I would not feel safe or comfortable enough to hang up a pride flag.

It's an open secret within my extended family and church that I'm trans. Those are the two main places I get misgendered and dead named nowadays because they knew me pre transition and I just don't have the courage to officially come out to them. Even so, I know everybody knows on some level but most people don't understand the whole pronouns thing. Nobody tells me I'm going to hell or anything and I've sung in the men's choir since I joined it pre T. I don't bother because I'm about to move anyhow.

I've also isolated myself a lot in order to avoid potential transphobia here. The most transphobia I ever got on a daily basis was in public school from laws, administration, and some students. It was really bad. Some other students were nice and supportive, though. I had to homeschool myself to avoid all that.

Gender roles are generally strictly divided here. I feel a lot of pressure to strictly conform to male gender roles because it seems like nobody else plays around with them. You don't often see men with long hair or piercings or anything of that sort. Honestly, I don't feel like I'm being authentic with myself right now. It's better than it was pre transition, but still stifling. It's a very conformist society.

Non binary people just aren't a thing here. I don't mean to say that a non binary identity is invalid or that there aren't non binary people here, but they are widely not acknowledged or out to the public around here. When I was younger, I identified as nonbinary and had a pretty androgynous appearance. A lot of times in school people would be like "WHAT ARE YOU??? ARE YOU A BOY OR A GIRL??????" One time in a class while I was absent the teacher pulled up my school records so the students could see my sex assigned at birth because they kept asking about it. People don't know what nonbinary is a lot of the time.

The laws here are really bad, obviously. I have no legal protection against discrimination or hate crimes. I have to go to a different state to get my medication even though I'm a legal adult. Honestly though, most people aren't as hateful as the politicians pushing the laws. I've used the men's bathroom at a lot of different places and never got into any trouble, even though it's technically illegal.

The deep south actually has a very significant amount of queer people. I think most tend to congregate around big cities like Atlanta, New Orleans, and Huntsville, though.

I don't exactly hate it here. I wish people were more informed and the laws were better, but it's my home.