ADHD

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A casual community for people with ADHD

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Relevant Lemmy communities:

Neurodivergent Life Hacks

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Is texting not a conversation, or is it just me? (lemmy.world)

submitted 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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When texting people in general I find it frustrating that people don’t seem to view it as a conversation. If someone texts me and I catch it and text back right away, I get frustrated when people don’t return the favor. They might text back 5, 10, minutes or an hour or more later. Why did you text me if you didn’t want to have a conversation? Why am I the one sitting here waiting for a response?

It’s like someone sitting down across from at a table and asking you “Hey, how ya doin?” You respond “Great! what’s up?” and they just sit there for 10 minutes not saying anything.

Might be the whisper of ASD in my ADHD contributing to not understanding how this social interaction actually works vs how I think it should work.

Anyone else have this grinding their gears?

E: apparently it’s just me!

Thanks for the replies, everyone.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago

I find the minimal obligation to respond immediately to text messages convenient and relieving. Perhaps it may help to consider text messages like emails instead of like chats. My first phone displayed texts like emails, so that's how my brain treats them, despite the chat layouts of modern apps.

If I want to have a conversation with someone, I will either call them or meet up with them. As a general rule of thumb, if something requires urgency or more than a couple of texts to resolve, it should probably be a phone call.