Asklemmy

43856 readers

1840 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy 🔍

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

Open-ended question
Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

Lemmyverse: community search
sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
[email protected]: a community for finding communities

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_[email protected]~

founded 5 years ago

MODERATORS

[email protected]

Do you have a sibling? What is the relationship like? (lemmy.dbzer0.com)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

62 comments fedilink hide all child comments

I'm male aged 19-22, I have an older brother about 4-5 years older (giving age ranges for better anonymity). Relationship is... not good (read: it's terrible, horrifyingly terrible, arch-nemesis). How about you?

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I appreciate that everyone doesn’t have perfect relationships with their siblings.

Growing up, my parents made me feel horrible for having a bad one with my sibling. As though there was something wrong with me.

To this day, I carry a lot of shame around it, as in, how can I expect to have healthy relationships with friends and professional relationships at work if I couldn’t even manage one with my sister?

So, thank you all for making me feel less like an anomaly.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Looking at my parents and their siblings (varying degrees of almost no contact to some contact with one exception that is good), and looking at my sibling (really good), it has nothing to do with you. It's just, two people that shared an environment growing up, and those two people can be close or not.

I feel very grateful for my sibling, but that's just it. We happen to have the personalities that match.

It's not your fault.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

That’s a very even way of looking at it. I can’t tell you how much that perspective means to me, and how much that makes sense.

I think that’s the lens I’ll try to embrace when I look at our relationship moving forward.