this post was submitted on 20 Dec 2023

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Showerthoughts

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Porn addiction may be loneliness (discuss.tchncs.de)

submitted 10 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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If you masturbate often and don't feel the relief you expect, thus feeling addicted to sex/masturbation: is it really cumming you are after or do seek the intimacy that comes with sexual relationships? If it's the latter, you may not be "addicted", you just tried to use the wrong tool for the job (pun intended). While this may not bring any improvement to your situation, at least know that you are not broken. Trying to fix the longing for intimacy with masturbation is just like trying to fix thirst by drinking oil. It may seem related, yet will ultimately get you nowhere.

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

I'm not sure what your thesis is, can you clarify it please?

Are you saying having sex with somebody you don't like is healthier than masturbating?

Or are you saying that masturbation removes people's drive to form relationships?

Would you say the same thing to somebody who's sleeping around and not forming a long-term relationship? Or would that'd be okay?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I think it's safe to say that op is only stating that people that don't have meaningful relationships are ultimately substituting with a hollow replacement. Not that they're addicted. More so that they're misinterpreting it as addiction.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Yep, that's exactly it. I wonder how many ppl can't quit masturbating, start to believe that they are addicted to porn/masturbation and start feeling bad accodringly, while all there was to their "addiction" was loneliness they tried to fix with the wrong tool.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

The only way to know is to finally find the trigger and if the "addiction" goes away as a result. I found out a few things about myself that helped me to kick my desires that were running me ragged. Definitely wasn't an addiction. Now finding out that I have other things on the other side that are keeping me from being able to be completely balanced. We are very complex beings.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

I know what thats like, I could unravel my thoghts but Ill be brief. Not only is it bad not having a community/place/group to express a core aspect of yourself. but because of its sensitive subject matter, nobody to discuss it with outside of an anonymised account. Under this situation, Porn will mess you up.