this post was submitted on 27 Nov 2023
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[–] [email protected] 155 points 11 months ago (6 children)

"As part of integration planning, and following an organizational needs assessment, we identified go-forward roles that will be required within the combined company."

Totally devoid of any humanity. Corporate jargon freaks me out. It shouldn't, but it really gets to me.

[–] [email protected] 108 points 11 months ago

Shareholders are the worst creation of capitalism so far.

It allows you to create anonymous gray masters that you must serve at any cost no matter how humanly heinous they are.

Also, the bad thing that can happen to the shareholders is that they lose a little money whereas the people beholden to the shareholders can lose everything they have including their souls, and all the shareholders have to do is say "I had nothing to do with it, I just bought a piece of paper, I didn't even get a piece of paper I got an nft" and wash their hands of the whole thing.

The fact that our retirement accounts are being used to fund the hedge managers that create small shareholders that run the businesses that fire us so that the large shareholders get more money now in hopes that in some theoretical future the small shareholders get enough money to enjoy our twilight years is absolute insanity.

[–] [email protected] 47 points 11 months ago

I think it's totally reasonable to be weirded out by corporate jargon. It's so 1984 esque. It seems like it's created to help capitalists do their best not to lie in legal terms while at the same time communicating to their shareholders that money matters while also still trying to put on a facade of humanity for the PR front.

It's so gross.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 11 months ago (1 children)

It is jargon for sure, and bloviating to mask layoffs.

A merger will always have layoffs because there will be duplication of roles, especially in lower/middle management.

Some duplication may also occur in boots-on-the-ground roles, depending on the companies.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago (2 children)

They’re masking it? Seems pretty plain to me.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

Maybe only masking in terms of trying to somehow make it seem justified and as a natural part of their company's growth. But you're not wrong.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

It's "polite" and therefore right. The angry people are the ones being unreasonable and are thus wrong. They instead should write a calm sounding letter, submit it to the media that is totally not owned by the same shareholders that wronged them. /s

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago

That's capitalism. It's a system that is devoid of humanity. Money is above everything, including human life.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

the uncanny valley has made verbal inroads.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

It sounds more like an AI-generated statement