this post was submitted on 14 Nov 2023
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The Monkey's Paw

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Want to make a wish? Just ask the Monkey’s Paw! No strings attached.*

Just create a post that starts with “I wish ___”. Other users will then grant you the wish, and probably not how you intended.

^(*)^ ^Strings^ ^definitely^ ^attached.^ ^Satisfaction^ ^not^ ^guaranteed.^ ^Wish^ ^will^ ^likely^ ^backfire.^

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Granted. Cheech, Chong, Willie Nelson, Snoop Dogg, and Seth Rogan all magically appear in front of you, eyes bloodshot.

They pat their pockets, pull them inside out, and look around confused.

All at once, their glazed eyes settle on you.

If you had any weed, it seems to have disappeared. In fact, it's disappeared worldwide.

They seem to be getting more agitated and angry at you as they become an increasingly less high five.

Willie grabs a kitchen knife.

You start to run.