this post was submitted on 21 Oct 2023
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Mildly Interesting
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This is for strictly mildly interesting material. If it's too interesting, it doesn't belong. If it's not interesting, it doesn't belong.
This is obviously an objective criteria, so the mods are always right. Or maybe mildly right? Ahh.. what do we know?
Just post some stuff and don't spam.
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Or just don't film in portrait.
And when anyone films in portrait, make sure to punish anyone trying to watch the footage with a similarly criminal portrait orientation, by putting borders round the side of the portrait content to force it to be landscape, thus shrinking the content to roughly a ninth of their screen, unless they switch to the blessed landscape orientation when it will fill a glorious third of the screen. Let no one watch it full size for the creator thereof has sinned against the gods of landscape.
This is the right and proper punishment for content creators who break the landscape law: let no one see this video fullscreen, for they have sinned against landscape. https://ibb.co/x2MQQG2 let the borders of landscape wrath descend and pad, and let fullscreen be disabled for all, for if landscape viewers are denied fullscreen EVERYONE MUST SUFFER.
Oh, or you could just skip the fuzzy bars in portrait mode if you're feeling more accommodating to phone users.
Or just film in landscape and everyone wins.
Alright, you win, I'll never use my phone in portrait ever again, especially not to film my dog in a storm. I'll make sure I turn that baby right to your preferred orientation and I'll stop complaining about pointless bars at the side of other people's portrait content.
If you want, I can go back through my canara roll and delete everything that's in portrait just in case I'm ever tempted to sell it to a news organisation. I'll make sure to only ever post landscape content to whatsapp, signal and especially tiktok and instagram, because otherwise some relative, friend or random Internet user might share it in portrait.
You're right. That's definitely a better solution than not putting annoying fuzzy bars on portrait content.
Glad you've seen the light. Go in peace.
Someone note this moment in history. The war has finally been won