this post was submitted on 15 Oct 2023
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[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I would buy so many more decorations and put them up. I would even start the first week of September just for shits and giggles

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

This is the impregnation. The birth happens nine months later, so that'd be the end of July.

checks to find out what happens on July 31

https://nationaltoday.com/july-holidays/

Harry Potter's Birthday – July 31

Uh oh.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religious_debates_over_the_Harry_Potter_series

Religious debates over the Harry Potter series of books by J. K. Rowling are based on claims that the novels contain occult or Satanic subtexts.

Clearly we were warned and disregarded the obvious signs.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You just started their next conspiracy theory.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I haven't read the series, but apparently his mother was a witch.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Order_of_the_Phoenix_(fictional_organisation)#Lily_Potter

Lily J. Potter (née Evans) is the mother of Harry Potter. She is described as being very pretty, with startlingly green almond-shaped eyes and thick, long, dark auburn hair.

Although Lily is Muggle-born, she is an extremely gifted witch at the top of her class.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexuality_in_Christian_demonology

Heinrich Kramer and Jacob Sprenger (15th century), authors of the Malleus Maleficarum, adopted an intermediate position. According to their book, demons did not feel love for witches. This is because sexual relationships with them were a part of the diabolical pact these men and women made with Satan.

William of Auvergne conceived the idea that demons felt a particular and morbid attraction to long and beautiful female hair, and thus women had to follow the Christian use of covering it to avoid exciting desire in them. Tauler had the opinion that demons were lascivious and thus they wanted to have sexual intercourse with humans to satisfy their lewdness. Sinistrari supported the idea that demons felt sexual desire, but satisfaction and pleasure were not the only motivation to have sexual relationships with humans, another reason being that of impregnating women.

It does all seem to check out. The long hair, the witchery, the demon impregnation, Harry Potter, July 31.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I like your reasoning but sadly Oct 31st + 40 weeks gives us Aug 6th, not July 31st. ☹️

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

So, 9 months is a bit of a shorthand used in common discourse -- I doubt that the real life average is perfectly that -- but looking for specific numbers, it sounds like the 40 week number is the average time from the last pre-conception menstral period, rather then the average time from conception.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pregnancy

Duration: ~40 weeks from the last menstrual period (38 weeks after conception)

So, working through this, Halloween night wouldn't have been the time that Lily Potter had her last menstrual period, but rather the point in time that she and Satan were actually getting things in motion.

That says that the actual average time from conception to birth is a week less, so one could maybe argue that it should be July 24 or that Harry was a little off average.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

Bet you could find a blow up Satan and a blow up goth lookin chick and arrange them so it looks like they're boning

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Find all the good things about Satan and include that information

It'll really pass them off

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

I have no special regard for Satan; but I can at least claim that I have no prejudice against him. It may even be that I lean a little his way, on account of his not having a fair show. All religions issue bibles against him, and say the most injurious things about him, but we never hear his side. We have none but evidence for the prosecution and yet we have rendered the verdict. To my mind, this is irregular. It is un-English. It is un-American; it is French. Without this precedent Dreyfus could not have been condemned. As soon as I can get at the facts I will undertake his rehabilitation myself if I can find an unpolitic publisher. It is a thing we ought to be willing to do for anyone who is under a cloud. We may not pay him reverance, for that would be indiscreet, but we can at least respect his talents. A person who has for untold centuries maintained the imposing position of spiritual head of four-fifths of the human race, and political head of the whole of it, must be granted the possession of executive abilites of the loftiest order. In his large presence the other popes and politicians shrink to midgets for the microscope. I would like to see him. I would rather see him and shake him by the tail than any member of the European concert.