this post was submitted on 16 Sep 2023
251 points (95.0% liked)
Autism
6867 readers
4 users here now
A community for respectful discussion and memes related to autism acceptance. All neurotypes are welcome.
We have created our own instance! Visit Autism Place the following community for more info.
Community:
Values
- Acceptance
- Openness
- Understanding
- Equality
- Reciprocity
- Mutuality
- Love
Rules
- No abusive, derogatory, or offensive post/comments e.g: racism, sexism, religious hatred, homophobia, gatekeeping, trolling.
- Posts must be related to autism, off-topic discussions happen in the matrix chat.
- Your posts must include a text body. It doesn't have to be long, it just needs to be descriptive.
- Do not request donations.
- Be respectful in discussions.
- Do not post misinformation.
- Mark NSFW content accordingly.
- Do not promote Autism Speaks.
- General Lemmy World rules.
Encouraged
- Open acceptance of all autism levels as a respectable neurotype.
- Funny memes.
- Respectful venting.
- Describe posts of pictures/memes using text in the body for our visually impaired users.
- Welcoming and accepting attitudes.
- Questions regarding autism.
- Questions on confusing situations.
- Seeking and sharing support.
- Engagement in our community's values.
- Expressing a difference of opinion without directly insulting another user.
- Please report questionable posts and let the mods deal with it. Chat Room
- We have a chat room! Want to engage in dialogue? Come join us at the community's Matrix Chat.
.
Helpful Resources
- Are you seeking education, support groups, and more? Take a look at our list of helpful resources.
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
I half suspect this is what my parents did. I vaguely remember going to therapy as a child, but I do not know the results of that, or even why I was there but having gotten a diagnosis of ADHD and BPD with a strong suggestion to see specialist for autism, I've kinda wondered about those memories and if my parents knew all along and just didn't tell me.
My aunt was a teacher and she was always bringing up autism & ADHD stuff with my mom, with me in earshot. Mom would get mad and dismiss everything and then rant about how I didn't need to get labelled for the rest of my lives. I couldn't really interact with kids my own age, hated high-pitched loud noises and bright lights, spent a long time learning how to do everything (but knew it inside-out once I did), had a ton of gastro-intestinal issues, and got constantly berated by my mom for info-dumping ("why aren't you this excited about our lord and savior?") If I had a word cloud of everything my dad said to me as a kid, "WHY ARE YOU SO SLOW" would be in the biggest set of words. Mom homeschooled me as well, so I never got feedback from teachers or professionals.
I can think of at least three times in my teens/adult years where I flat-out told my mom "there's something wrong with me. Maybe I need to take medication? Or maybe talk to someone?" and she always just suggested we ask god for help. Then dad would take the phone and start praying. Every single time.
I graduated with straight As in CS (and a low A in engineering), and brute-forced my way through learning socialization and culture. On the outside I'm a success story, but I mostly got there by hurting myself. I was always the golden child who could do no wrong and the disappointment that obviously didn't want to do the right thing. Well, I still am, but I'm in a much better space mentally. I'm married and have a daughter who is at least as weird as I was at that age. I really hope I can be kinder to her than my parents were to me.
Your mom sounds difficult to talk to. However, it also sounds like your daughter is lucky to have you 🙂