this post was submitted on 05 Sep 2023
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Am I the Asshole?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/BluebirdFinancial101 on 2023-09-05 14:56:33.


i'm (21f) my mom (43) and dad (46) decided to get divorced last month. it was taken to court because of division of property and also my dad doesn't really want a divorce.

they're not bad people. they just met and got married at a young age and I think it was the mistake of their lives. they're not good for each other and they don't know how to communicate. their whole marriage was full of stupid fights.

i isolated myself from these fights throughout high school and didn't care about their marriage. i got a scholarship for university and moved to another city. i've been seeing them 1-2 times a year, but we keep in touch because they're my parents.

when i heard the news, i was relieved to be honest and said "all the best for both of you". but that when it went to court, things got very complicated. all the property they bought during the marriage is in my mother's name and she refuses to share 50/50. she has her own reasons but i really don't care.

i just want them to leave me alone. one side keeps calling me and asking me to talk to convince the other side. i tried to help a few times, but my general response was "leave me out of it". but they didn't stop calling me. yesterday my father asked for something similar again. i said "i don't know if you're a child or me. leave me the fuck alone. just get a nice divorce, it's not that hard." my father got angry and accused me of being careless. after that i hung up the phone. i sent a message to my mom telling her not to call me anymore about the divorce. she didn't take it well either.

AITA for it?

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[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

NTA - very unfortunate that both your parents are using you that way. IMO, the best thing for you is to try your best to remain calm but firm. Getting upset and loud will not help your relationship with them. If you have to bite you lip, or count to 10 before answering, do it. Sooner or later it will be over and things should go back to normal a little more.