this post was submitted on 13 Dec 2024
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ADHD

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I feel so isolated, so depressed and anxious whenever I think of things such as getting my GED or finally heading out to go to a dentist and get my teeth fixed. Or hanging out with my worthless, POS problematic family. I have no idea why. I know I'm not smart enough for the GED and I fear things going wrong. I just wanna get it done in just one or a few days. I just want to rest and live without a diploma since I believe I sorta have average intelligence as I was told before. I don't really have college plans cause I have no interest in anything, and I know there's some colleges out there that don't require a diploma or similar.

I just really wish I could pay someone to take it for me or do it in a way that doesn't take a long time or just bypass it. I don't even feel like living.

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[–] ZebulonP@lemmy.world 4 points 6 days ago (1 children)

It is normal to be anxious about things sometimes. I also didn't have my GED and had dental issues and felt less than because of it. The dread I'd feel having to go through the testing or the cost of fixing my teeth made me not want to go through either. I did eventually do both, after basically giving myself an ultimatum. I was depressed and didn't feel like existing as well, but there were a few people that I really didn't want to let down. The place by me that let me obtain my GED has a process where they would test your knowledge, then tutor you on your gaps, then let you take the tests. I ended up passing with pretty high scores because I over prepared, which felt really nice. That gave me enough confidence to get my teeth fixed and worry about the cost later, which also boosted my confidence. The anxiety didn't go away entirely, but I remember the feeling of overcoming what I thought were impossible tasks. That was over a decade ago. I've since gotten a good career and I'm currently the most confident I've been. I don't know if my story will help you, but maybe you knowing you aren't alone in that feeling can offer some solace. My only advice would be to not let the anxiety control you. It's not a switch you can just turn off, but maybe by tricking your brain by remembering failing won't hurt/kill you, you can overcome yours.

[–] memeflicks@lemmy.world 5 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Its good to hear your story. I do have insurance on my side which helps a lot.

[–] ZebulonP@lemmy.world 5 points 6 days ago

That is very fortunate. I grew up very poor and didn't have that option. Maybe if that is a less daunting task, you can do that first. I genuinely hope you can overcome the anxiety. Take care