this post was submitted on 04 Dec 2024
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No Stupid Questions

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Hey there, I was wondering if I'm the only one who feels like this or not.

So I grew up thinking that we people all look different and never had a concept of something such as "white" and "black" people.

But especially in the last years I noticed more and more that a lot of people make such a big thing out of whether someone is "black" or "white" and what their ethnicity is.

It feels like it's to the point where they make this define their core identity as if it's very relevant how people look and how bright/dark their skin is as if this changes their personality.

It's like so many of these people constantly bring this up to the point where it's brainwashing and they literally even use racial slur as slang that was used in the past to devalue and enslave people based on their skin tone.

Since I experienced this it made me very uncomfortable since I never had this concept before and now I constantly have to obsessively think about it and feel like it's manipulating me and these people still bring it up all the time.

I think this is driving me insane cause I never would think about humans so strongly because of their skin or something since it simply isn't relevant and it just feels wrong but I can't escape it since so many people continue to make such a big deal out of it.


Edit: To the people saying people have different advantages because of their skin, I'm fully aware of that and I wasn't intending to debate that. My question was primarily about if other people have the same uncomfortable feeling that many people differentiate between people based on their skin and make such a big deal out of it (so more a personal feelings question than a generale debate about why it exists) because imo in a healthy society this shouldn't be the case. But in my opinion the fact that we continue this behaviour instead of changing it is the exact reason we have racism and the issues of inequality based on someone's skin in the first place. We need to start to change at some place and not just give up on it. If we continue to see people as "black" or "white" instead of just seeing them as "people" and only look at the past we will never end this issue. Ignorance is certainly not the solution. I found these videos where I think Elon Musk and Morgan Freeman are pretty much hitting the nail on the head.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

I'm not sure what you're asking here. Are you asking why people bring up being black or make it a part of their identity? Being black in America is a part of their every day lived experience. At no point will society let them forget they are black and just let them be themselves. If not outright discrimination, then they'll experience people making assumptions about them based solely on the color of their skin. Assuming they're poor, uneducated, unintelligent, untrustworthy, or dangerous. So, since they can't escape the label anyways, they embrace it in order to find community and to heal. Like one might do if they were a part of the LGBTQ+ community.

Are you asking why black people have stereotypes about white people? The same reason you have stereotypes about anything. Humans are pattern recognizing machines, often to our own detriment.

Are you asking why black people might treat white people with disdain or fear? It's because the most blatant discrimination towards any out-group will always come from the most insulated in-group. As a result, they can't blindly trust that white people will treat them with dignity or respect.

Are you asking how we end racism or to get more people to think like you (colorblind)? That requires one, ending systemic oppression of black people (if you think this step is done, then you need to do you some learning). Two, educating people on the history of black people in America, both their contributions and their struggles, so that there's a solid understanding and empathy built up. Three, wait several generations so that no one has negative, undeserved biases against black people OR create a culture where people can be called out on their racist actions without fear of retribution or retaliation.

This is really difficult to grasp, especially if you've never experienced direct discrimination and think that is just the actions of individuals that are the issue. As a white man with a black partner, it took me YEARS to really breakdown all the negative assumptions that society instilled in me without me even realizing. Even the "I treat everyone the same, regardless of their skin color" thought is bad, because it means you're unwilling to listen when people tell you they're being harmed because of their skin color. Especially if it's you doing the harm.

You can't start by being mad at the discriminated for telling you they're being discriminated against. You need to listen to them with empathy and compassion, and realize also that they don't really need to teach you about this stuff, you need to be inquisitive and want to learn.