this post was submitted on 06 Nov 2024
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half joke first. nobody's trying to meddle in our bodily autonomy, yet.
edit: i havent looked too close at it but the mensliberation space on lemmy.ca may interest you? cancermancer down bellow has a rec for r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates that looks to have another good perspective in the topic. so im sticking it right here with the other.
I'll try to approach the topic from my perspective as well. my gender has never really be part of my internal view of myself. but it is an inescapable part of how other people will see me, and the rules are always whatever the other person wants. so maybe not the poster child for speaking on masculinity. i'm literally the default charater generator in every videogame, but it's just a hallucinating meat suit.
talking about gender concepts and social roles was a norm growing up because i did that growing up in the weird outside groups the christian kids chased. any reference to maculinity was done at me as an attack, even when i was doing it according to the rules. i agree, there are few places for young men to explore their way out of those strict views. especially in the early years. i've often seen them jump straight into spaces meant to be safe for people who've had not great experiances with the topic, especially women. and press other people to do all the work, explain things to them and navigate their often* harsh language. and i get it. when you've only ever been allowed to express 3 levels of the same emotion, it's gonna be rough sorting that out.
it's going to be on people who have worked their way through that mind set to make those places for kids to start the process. most importantly, people who share their experiance and perspective. yes folls like me can and really need to come in there and talk openly. but my own experiance is never going to line up in a way that will connect with those kids. even when i look exactly like our experiance should line up.
...if theres more spelling mistakes then there are more spelling mistakes. fuck it thats too much text for a phone
Bodily autonomy? What's this scar on my cock again?
fair point. sounds like theres a need for a space to have these conversations. with people effected by the topic and moded by people on the otherside of the joirney, who could have empathy in the difficult moments. anyone know of a space? i'll try engaging where i can.
Have also heard people talking about giving men vasectomies at 16 (people who don't understand they can't actually be undone)
FWIW I've only seen that used to illustrate how ridiculous it is that we find it essentially normal to have laws controlling what women can do with their reproductive systems but not men. I've not seen a single credible example of someone seriously suggesting this.
I've known a person who took that seriously and thought it was a good idea
I mean, yes, I'm sure there are people who do. There are people who think the earth is flat. They don't influence policy though.
Edit - my point is, no one is coming for your testes, and knowing someone who thinks it's a good idea is no better an example here than it would be for me to say I'm worried a flat earther is going to influence space exploration policy.
Fair point
I appreciate your otherwise quality comment but I have to say that I don't intend to use a space that only views men's issues through a feminist lens.
On Reddit, LeftWingMaleAdvocates is a solid lefty men's space.
i spent all of a minute poking around. not a topic i deep dive in really. more hoping to pose the question of "hey do we maybe have a space like this?". someplace where people having a shared perspective would have the patience for eachothers early questions they once had.
i'm not on reddit but a few minutes poking around there it doesn't look crazypants. so i'll add it to my comment too.
No that's fair, I don't want you to feel like I'm saying you're acting in bad faith because I absolutely do not believe that.
nah i get it, i assumed good faith on your part as well. i skimmed through some threads in that sub and all i wanted to do was start jumping saying "guys just pause a second so we can talk about some of this language". but thats absolutely not the place for me to do that.
it would be as productive as the guys who'd go into r/twoxchromosomes posting "explain like i'm 5 why my wife left over not doing the dishes enough". assumimg good faith, i get he's thinking "ok this is where other women who have done this talk, i'll ask them". there wasnt anyplace else to send the dude, so a few people would try responding. but it always devolved into language policing, because not doing so in that space would forfit the sub to the people it was designed to be safe from. i never commented in that space specifically because it was their sub and i was just there to understand perspectives. i was a guest in their home.
people need to be able to use the only words they know with the meaning they understand them to have. before they can do any self reflection or understand why it becomes important to adjust our language for eachother sometimes.