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Women of Lemmy, how to pleasure someone that does not enjoy any clitoris stimulation? (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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Well, as the title says, I'm facing an issue that I'm not sure how to improve.

My partner does not enjoy any sort of clitoris stimulation, I tried everything from rough to gentle, from fingers to tongue, with lube and without. It seems that she truly does not enjoy it in anyway.

She does enjoy penetration very much and I put all of my efforts there, but I feel like I can't get her to an orgasm/higher pleasure and while she is satisfied right now I fear that over time she wont be.

So my question is what else can I do? There are some other pleasure areas that we use such as ears, emotional connection, fantasies, dirty talk, etc.

Maybe something I haven't tried on the clitoris? Maybe something else that can take it to the next level? Maybe something that she can do? Maybe just accept that this is okay? Again, she does enjoy herself a lot and is completely satisfied as far as I know, but as I'm her first I think that she is missing out on a level of pleasure that I can't figure how to help her achieve without the clitoris.

ETA: she does not masturbate, so no guidance or hidden methods on her part.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

It's probably too sensitive? Have you tried stimulating it indirectly, for example by licking/touching its hood right above it instead?

Also, take your time, listen to the body language and if you sense some kind of positive response you keep doing exactly that, you don't change the pace, pressure, angle, etc.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I did try that, it seems to just lack any pleasure, it is sensitive, but less then other people I have been with and no matter what I do it does not produce pleasure, usually it just doesn't do anything for her

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago

Sorry I couldn't help. Ultimately, communication is key and if you're both satisfied and she doesn't feel she needs more or missing out, then there's no harm :)