ADHD

Sorry if this is the wrong place, I just really need to vent somewhere.

I had a followup today to discuss the next steps since neither guanfacine nor atomoxetine worked out. I've been waiting for this because I know stimulants are the first line treatment and I've had nothing but awful experiences with the other meds. He had me take a drug test ahead of time - to make sure I wasn't already taking stimulants, he said. I've been open about everything I'm on and he said it would be fine. That was a lie.

I tested positive for a bit of weed, which I told him about. It's legal in my state. Despite saying it was fine before (I asked, specifically), now he changed his tune and said he's going to keep testing me and if I test positive three times he won't prescribe me any stimulants.

The kicker? I even have a prescription for it, because I worry about exactly things like this. It's for chronic pain, but tbh helps my depression and anxiety too. I don't even use much - about $150 in edibles over the last year. But if I spent that much on alcohol every weekend, that would be no barrier to getting a prescription.

I went in for help and was nothing but honest, and I left feeling attacked over prescription medicine that's been helping me. What the fuck. I'm so frustrated and angry I just want to cry. Why is it so hard to get help?