this post was submitted on 10 Oct 2024
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[–] [email protected] 111 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (32 children)

I sneezed at an angle this morning and fucked my back up. Also, why the fuck does a large portion of my body and weight sit atop a single column of bones precariously cushioned by jelly and rubbery bits? And if said jelly/rubbery bits get squeezed a bit too hard, the bones smash nerves that control my fucking extremities?

Nature really fucked us.

[–] [email protected] 95 points 1 month ago (7 children)

Ah, see the warranty only covers you until you procreate.

From that point on, who cares if your body evolved to crumble into dust immediately after?

In fact kind of a lot of creatures literally die right after creating offspring.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

I think the warranty stretches a little further. You also need to live long enough to ensure your offspring become moderately self sufficient, but anything above 30 is definitely buyer beware

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