this post was submitted on 07 Oct 2024
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I'm having similar thoughts lately. As if after one trauma (12 years ago, or a bit more, one girl told me to "go to my mom" and a few more things) I stopped taking full responsibility for my own existence and started relying on external criteria, like performance, for example. And taking that responsibility again feels as if reality is real again.
Oof, that sounds like it'll be an intense climb back in to reality!
Yes, it's also a simplification - not a sudden realization and there were setbacks before. As always