Autism

d) But also there's a large swath of individuals out there who get a cookie for existing in the right space, time and place as compared to others. And by this I mean people get grants, or can use research, or even altered projects to pocket themselves into wealth and it's absolutely utilizing privilege to sustain comfort levels. There's a ton of autistic individuals who could probably tell you something similar to what this study did (which I just believe is aggregated data) just based off a hunch. But they aren't riding on a wave of grant money. Or if that's not the case here - leading to a space where they can ride a wave of grant money in the future. And this isn't something that just affects neurodivergent people. In general, if you have something "wrong" with you - you're more prone to being underemployed or unemployable (to society's eyes) and most times these things are compound "issues" which include gender, race, mental health, mental disorders, physical disabilities, class, education, sociability (such as attractiveness and general acceptance rate), location - etc. I once dated a gal who said she dated a guy before me - who got paid to go to college from his parents. Got everything in life handed to him. Got a job straight out of college. Never really had to work, even when he was "working" just sat at a desk and got paid three figures. I know he's not alone in this. I know he's also not the majority. But as I have moved around this country, I have seen how heavily inequality hits. Some people just live it large, and others are constantly sinking. And neither side really seems to know about one another, but it's a blessing to not have to live in wanting. And people who get to exist by peddling bullshit and not even realizing it are scum-suckers to me.

e) But I also don't do well with people who say sorry like a handshake. Say it if you mean it, and not to be a passive-aggressive tunt on the internet. You can do better. We can all do better.

f) Also last one - being that we as a group of individuals don't have to put our fingers over our faces like mustaches and think "look at how creative and different we are! We're so special, and this paper proves it. RDRR!" Because we're not some homogeneous blob. Superficial forms of validation can be nice, but at the end of the day - they're the same as drinking sugar water. Real validation comes from inside. Just being aware of the fact that you are a human being, a complex creature, and filled with your own set of wants and needs. And they have ever right to be met, because you're you. And this is more of an ableist-y kinda argument but what I mean is - I have read a handful of beautiful things since arriving here (PieFed). And I put the effort in, because I think that science is important, and these pieces help us grow not only as a person but as a people all together. But I need it to have substance. And when something is so iffy, and so flawed - but everyone is clapping at it - then are we really putting in the effort to read it? Or are we looking at the summary - thinking "YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT! WE'RE SO COOL!" and celebrating it. Which - by all means celebrate who you are. But don't get caught up in this snake oil crap. Because like - these are the people who later become "consultants" and "specialist" and go on Youtube and have special programs to reach out to other "autists" (and idk who these people are so this is just an assumption based off of serial killer logic in which you kill who you're sexually attracted to - so you're more than likely to study who you're attached to) and create micro-cults of brain-drained heads that form that dreaded sounding board or hive-mindedness or whatever they call that thing that happens when all the opinions are the same and you make everything a "safe-space" by removing anyone who doesn't walk or talk like you.

But also apologies if I hurt your feelings right back at you - because I am an intense person with intense emotions and opinions and I can only speak my mind on this stuff. But also I am in an advancedly crummy mood because the mental thresholds of my pain and currently being pressed to their limits. So here's a grumpy, scummy shit mess of a series of posts. It's just how I feel. At the end of the day - my opinions mean nothing and I absolutely will not think of this in any means other than "this is how not to do a study" in the future. Because it's just my opinion on the matter.