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I hear you. I have addictive tendencies so it probably would backfire.
Honestly if this helps I was wasted on Xans one night and ended up falling in a canal alone and was terrified.
I threw away my stash, not knowing you should taper and can die just stopping.
What proceeded was a week of me lay in bed unable to eat but starving, twitching like a crack head at any movement, insomnia, shaking, sweats like nothing else, panic attacks and just generally wanting to die.
As I said before they feel that good that I would probably have been back on them if I didn’t stop going on the DarkWeb and falling out the loop with marketplaces.
I know it must be hard with your sleep issues, even more so as doctors are not keen on prescribing sleeping tablets due to the addictive nature of them, but I do hope you find a solution that works.
Finally I hope you don’t think I am lecturing you, just really wanted to stress how hard benzos are.
That said if a doctor prescribed them to you then they would manage any tapering off when it was time to come off them.
Good luck.