this post was submitted on 28 Apr 2024
146 points (83.8% liked)

No Stupid Questions

35910 readers
1048 users here now

No such thing. Ask away!

!nostupidquestions is a community dedicated to being helpful and answering each others' questions on various topics.

The rules for posting and commenting, besides the rules defined here for lemmy.world, are as follows:

Rules (interactive)


Rule 1- All posts must be legitimate questions. All post titles must include a question.

All posts must be legitimate questions, and all post titles must include a question. Questions that are joke or trolling questions, memes, song lyrics as title, etc. are not allowed here. See Rule 6 for all exceptions.



Rule 2- Your question subject cannot be illegal or NSFW material.

Your question subject cannot be illegal or NSFW material. You will be warned first, banned second.



Rule 3- Do not seek mental, medical and professional help here.

Do not seek mental, medical and professional help here. Breaking this rule will not get you or your post removed, but it will put you at risk, and possibly in danger.



Rule 4- No self promotion or upvote-farming of any kind.

That's it.



Rule 5- No baiting or sealioning or promoting an agenda.

Questions which, instead of being of an innocuous nature, are specifically intended (based on reports and in the opinion of our crack moderation team) to bait users into ideological wars on charged political topics will be removed and the authors warned - or banned - depending on severity.



Rule 6- Regarding META posts and joke questions.

Provided it is about the community itself, you may post non-question posts using the [META] tag on your post title.

On fridays, you are allowed to post meme and troll questions, on the condition that it's in text format only, and conforms with our other rules. These posts MUST include the [NSQ Friday] tag in their title.

If you post a serious question on friday and are looking only for legitimate answers, then please include the [Serious] tag on your post. Irrelevant replies will then be removed by moderators.



Rule 7- You can't intentionally annoy, mock, or harass other members.

If you intentionally annoy, mock, harass, or discriminate against any individual member, you will be removed.

Likewise, if you are a member, sympathiser or a resemblant of a movement that is known to largely hate, mock, discriminate against, and/or want to take lives of a group of people, and you were provably vocal about your hate, then you will be banned on sight.



Rule 8- All comments should try to stay relevant to their parent content.



Rule 9- Reposts from other platforms are not allowed.

Let everyone have their own content.



Rule 10- Majority of bots aren't allowed to participate here.



Credits

Our breathtaking icon was bestowed upon us by @Cevilia!

The greatest banner of all time: by @TheOneWithTheHair!

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

Found here, where the image also has the text as an ALT image description. https://chaos.social/@saxnot/112349120606446433

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 17 points 7 months ago (4 children)

I think this is looking at it backwards. I think we shouldn't view failure as a bad thing. Failure is learning. It's part of growing. You fail at something, you've learned something (well, hopefully). Often you learn more by failing than by succeeding.

Like coaching my kid's soccer team today: I want them to fail sometimes. I have a player doing well with his right foot and scores a couple of goals, I switch him to the other side and tell him to use his left foot "But I'm not good at it!" good. "I'm not good at goalie." Excellent, here's the goalie jersey and go get in there. That's the point, I'm trying to make them better soccer players. If we just played into their strengths all the time, it would limit how much of a better player they can become.

At work, as a programmer, I try something out. It doesn't work out because there was some unforeseen condition that causes my initial pattern to fail? No big deal, just redo the pattern from scratch (if, of course, there is the time for that) or rethink the pattern. And I've seen how often that solves some other problem, or makes another thing more efficient, or makes future development more easy.

So who cares if your coffee shop failed, or you're a "failed writer" (I've never heard that before), if we don't treat failure as a bad thing, then people will be more likely to accept that and learn from it.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

I think you're right about embracing failure, but I think this is different: is your kid's soccer team a failure if they don't play forever? Or is it a success that they play some games, maybe win once or twice, even just learn and have fun?

Some things in life we seem to label failures if they stop after a season, as if long-term stability were the only true goal.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

Not the same philosophy, but also a very useful one. Would go hand in hand with OP

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

This is a very important point to make.

I made my own post about problems I have with what was posted, but an angle that I would love if more people adopted would be to stop viewing failure as inherently negative and useless in nearly all cases.

Failure can teach you a lot if you are capable of reflection and analysis, and failure happens to everyone, all the time, and is totally normal.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago

The thing with football is that there is a specific goal (pun very much intended). It’s ok to have a mindset that you’re going to play in a way that makes it unlikely (in the beginning) you’ll achieve that goal (eg play left footed), but if that player never improved, would you still think it’s ‘working’)?

I worked in an industry for many years that was obsessed with goal-setting, and that mindset never appealed to me. I eventually found a book called Goal Free Living by Stephen M. Shapiro. It was a bit of an eye-opener for me, and the phrase “Carry a compass not a map” stayed with me until today. I’ve done several different things since then but I’ll never be famous for any of them as I still keep changing direction.