movies

So it's a video game movie, but a video game from the early days of video games, and it was loosely based on bad movies, literally there is no plot to the video game. It's Dwayne "the rock"Johnson playing Dwayne "the rock" Johnson as he always does, there's literally no depth to him or his character. There's a plot that's so rote and uninspired that you will never once be surprised at what comes next. There's jargon of every variety, accents way too far over the top, characters so 1 dimensional that paper would say they're thin.

And it's so damn good. It's "If I don't watch it at least once a year I feel something missing inside of my". You will quote it, you will laugh with it, you will vibe with it. It doesn't set out to redefine anything, but it does "rampage" so perfectly that it's a masterpiece.

It's a 90% movie for me, to 90% of the people I know in my life I would recommend it with confidence that they'll walk away happy with the recommendation. And those who I wouldn't recommend it to, I don't hold a grudge, it's not for everyone, but I also don't watch movies with them.

Related story: I remember the first time I learned of "rampage" the movie, I'm hugely anti-spoiler, I don't watch previews unless I'm probably not going to watch the movie. I don't remember which movie we were seeing in the theater, but we had our popcorn, we were there 5 minutes after the start time, the previews had just started (fuck movie theaters for this, and it's only gotten worse), I've ducked a couple previews already, and then I hear Dwayne Johnson say "George" and see a white gorilla, and I just about drop my popcorn, I turned to my wife and Said "there's no way this is what I think this is, I'm going to watch this whole damn thing, because there's no friggin way they made a movie with this source material". I've already written it off as 'yeah I'm not going to watch this, maybe I'll catch it on streaming'. By the end of the preview (which again, the movie is so damn by the numbers, it doesn't matter if you watch the preview, you know what you're getting from the title itself) not only was I excited, but my wife was "ok, we can watch that in the theater, what is the source material for it?" I explained it as "an early 90s arcade game with Godzilla, King Kong, and a werewolf climbing up buildings and knocking them down, just trying to wreck cities as fast as possible, for absolutely no reason but 'it's fun'". We saw it in the theater when it released, I hadn't watched any more previews for it, we walked away debating to see it a second time, or to just be happy with a day 1 streaming release purchase. I don't think we saw it a second time in the theater, that honorific is very rare (except in the time of movie-pass). Thanks for reliving that little nostalgia trip with me. I hope You've found much success in getting people to watch it, it's so much better than it had any right to be.