this post was submitted on 31 Mar 2024
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Men's Liberation

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This community is first and foremost a feminist community for men and masc people, but it is also a place to talk about men’s issues with a particular focus on intersectionality.


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Non-masculine perspectives are incredibly important in making sure that the lived experiences of others are present in discussions on masculinity, but please remember that this is a space to discuss issues pertaining to men and masc individuals. Be kind, open-minded, and take care that you aren't talking over men expressing their own lived experiences.



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[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Only if you broadcast your list of gender “check boxes”, and come down on others to follow them.

I think this is precisely what gender roles are supposed to do.

Do young men really pursue masculinity because it truly matches with the people they are or do they do that because of the benefits of being 'masculine'? You'll enjoy respect, authority, a certain sex-appeal, confidence... And if you challenge gender norms you'll experience the opposite. You're gonna be treated more like a women. And that's the reason why masculinity is appealing to young men. And I feel like this is fundamentally problematic. I don't think the individual traits are bad (as you said, responsibility, physical fitness etc), it is the expectations and privileges attached to masculinity.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago (1 children)

The broadcast to others is the point I'm targeting.

Keep your own list and enjoy it. Just don't expect it out of others, perhaps aside from your SO, and even that would only be a temporary thing, or a vehicle for discussion about changes in their life.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago (1 children)

There is an extreme pressure for boys and men to be masculine. It is like a radio so strong it interferes with any other radio station. There is so much discrimination you face as a 'feminine' man. In this context it feels odd to say 'mind your own business'

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

My original clearly is describing a goal state.

Edit especially the last line.

Edit.edit beyond that, the comment I replied to was discussing if gender roles can ever be positive. Ever.

To which I provided a scenario where they could. (focused on not imposing that "list" on others)