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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/janabutter on 2023-10-08 06:18:17.

How do I (24f) get the strength to break up with my bf (25m) . I am unhappy most of the time. Ever since I met him I’ve been not myself, all I do is cry. He doesn’t treat me horribly but I feel like I’m mothering a child. I love him so much but I hate him. I wish I never met him. I don’t want to get into details but there’s alot of elements in our relationship that needs work. And I’m tired. All I do is fucking cry but I don’t have the strength to end it. He’s my first boyfriend, he’s my bestfriend and confidant. How can someone I consider my bestfriend make me feel this sad and unhappy? We also work together. All I know is that this man should not make me cry 2-3 times a week. I should not be this depressed and this sad. I lost myself by being in this relationship. But if we end it I’ll have no one, not my family (we aren’t close), I don’t have a lot of close friends and they are in relationships. I just don’t know what to do

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Mindlygrand15 on 2023-10-08 05:41:12.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/sunshineluvvv on 2023-10-08 03:31:24.

Hello. For context: My partner and I live together and we’ve been together for 3 years.

My partner practices martial arts so he goes out on weekdays to BJJ and Karate classes. I’ve always had trouble sticking to a routine and staying motivated. I also have a history of anxiety. He knows this.

Lately I’ve gotten out of an anxiety crisis and I’ve decided enough is enough. I’ve been going to the gym at 7am, waking up at 6. Working out from 7am to 9am, weightlifting and doing some cardio. I’ve also paid weekly massages to chill out and relax. Sometimes I go out for a coffee by myself and I’m really enjoying my alone time. This has been helpful for controlling my anxiety attacks. I feel happier now.

We got into a fight 2 days ago because he says I’m going out too much and that I don’t spend too much time home as before. I told him that I thought he was being unfair because he goes out to his classes and I don’t say a thing because I know it’s something he enjoys. I also told him how this is being beneficial for my mental health and I feel kinda bad he is not supporting. He says he doesn’t understand how I can be 2 hours at the gym, and doesn’t get why I need so much massages. I told him I was not going to stop doing the things that are good for me and that I loved because of him. He hasn’t spoken to me since, just the “basic” stuff because we live together. Should I approach him? I always am the one who initiates conversation when we fight and I’m growing tired of it. I’m starting to feel frustrated without speaking to him. I know he needs time to process his emotions but I feel it’s been long enough.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/AmiableRobin on 2023-10-08 04:46:09.

Hi Reddit! TW: SA, DV

I know we can all agree that checking in on exes is a bad idea. I'm not really sure what spawned it - hanging out with friends & family, drinking, probably - but here we are. I feel like this might be long but my inner thoughts are in a bit of turmoil and I needed a safe space to vent.

I (27F) recently discovered my ex husband's (29M) social media and saw how he summarizes our divorce.

We were together 8 years, married for 6. We were both young, bad at communicating, and eventually it got to a point we couldn't heal from.

He had, throughout our entire relationship, struggled with commitment. Making multiple secret dating profiles, messaging women, asking for hookups, etc. There were 3 separate occasions he said he had/would change.

At a boiling point I asked for a divorce and, with my soon to be ex, started trying to plan an amicable split. Figure out splitting our finances, the house, our lives. I saw his behavior cracking, though. I also saw him not working towards the split and escalating any time I tried to make a decision. I was terrified. At times he had been physically violent in the past - nothing to leave bruises. Enough that I considered calling the cops but was too scared to escalate him more.

I made plans to leave him and started looking for apartments. I went to my doctor and explained I'd been in a physically violent relationship and things were escalating and I was scared. I went to seek resources, connect with a Social Worker. My doctor assisted in my referrals and also gave me Valium to take for the panic attacks and to help the transition, with my new lease starting in only 2 days.

My ex assaulted me the first night I was on Valium. The night ended in the bedroom and I was finally able to kick him out and lock the door. I left the next day. I had friends who picked me up and blocked me from his sight on the way out the door. They let me stay with them in the coming days to weeks to months. I went to the cops and reported him for the assault only a few days after it happened with ample support. My mom flew to meet me the day after it happened. I filed for divorce and served him papers.

In his posts - I've falsified everything. I cheated and then left him for a sugar daddy. I filed multiple charges against him to deflect and protect myself, sued him, and took him to court over my charges. He claims he had to spend tens of thousands defeating me and putting me in my place for the false charges. He went as far as to say that he was able to justify it because I had a kink for being SA'd and made content as a cam model in that category.

I don't know what actually happened out of my police report. I spoke to a detective twice and that was it. I had been told it had been handed over to the DA. I removed myself from the situation and tried to move on.

I communicated only through my attorney. I asked for our resources to be split 50/50 when it came to proceeds of the house we owned. We assumed our own debts. We kept our own private vehicles and assumed the loans associated. He claims I took everything. That I robbed him of anywhere from $250-500k, and left him high and dry. We didn't even have that much in equity - proceeds from the sale of our home came to ~$70k and were divided down the middle.

It's weird to read his warped perception of the things I've done to improve my life - buying a truck, travelling the world, returning home, and living my life. It's still a little terrifying to see him update his social media's about my life, and his warped perception of it.

I wish in some ways I'd never discovered his social media and the things he's been saying about me. I feel re-victamized after all these years to know that, in his mind I falsified one of the worst moments of my life, and that he is going so far to defend as to claim I took him to court over it.

I almost wish I did and that I had the opportunity to have my time on the stand now. This man is out here walking free and not even trying to make excuses for his behavior anymore, just claiming I lied.

I know women are constantly demonized in media for taking everything in the divorce but I almost, really, wish I did. It's some small part of me that wants to think of it as justice for the wrongs committed (I know it isn't), and the fact that he has never accepted any form of accountability of his actions.

I'm just so exhausted and hurt right now.

Thanks for reading,

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/PracticeEqual on 2023-10-07 23:24:17.

I’ve been hesitating from writing this for a long time but I think today’s the day. Here it goes.

I miss my dad.

He’s alive but he just doesn’t give a shit about me or my sisters. I remember him being a caring parent when I was young but now I think I only had this perception because my mum kept stepping in and making him look good.

My dads a provider. The old school kind. And to him, that’s all a dad’s supposed to do in a family. He never hit us, which is a big thing because it’s very common practice in my culture. He raised us with good values (respect your elders, help others, be kind, save etc) but he hardly ever followed his own advice. I am in my 30s and that man has never wished me happy birthday. We weren’t well off so I didn’t expect a cake or party but a wish would’ve done wonders for my self confidence. But nope.

My dad repeatedly cheated on my mum and probably still does. Some of his mistresses (yes, plural) have been close friends of my mum which just rubs salt on a deep wound. For the longest time, he made my mum look like a crazy woman and we believed him. Looking back, I hate myself for falling for those lies but Ive grown.

I am married now to a wonderful man, I moved away from all this but I never cut ties with him. I support him financially because he retired. I am paying off his loans, the same loans I begged him not to take. I keep telling myself this is the last one but I am lying to myself.

Last week I received an amazing opportunity which I wanted to share with him so I called him, twice. He didn’t pick up. I thought he’d see my missed calls and call back. It’s been 6 days and I don’t think he’ll call back. I know his phones working because he’s always on it. Always calling and checking up on his extended family members. Always on Facebook.

I don’t think his going to call.

I am not angry, or sad, or depressed. I am just numb inside. I am just tired. I don’t hate him but being his daughter has been exhausting.

My husband comes from a warm, welcoming family. They have treated me as one of their own since day 1. My MIL has called me more times than my dad has ever in my entire life and I’ve know this woman for only a few years.

I can’t discuss these things with my lovely husband because he doesn’t get it. He still hasn’t wrapped his head around the fact that no one from my family called to wish me on my birthday. He is still pissed about that so I am keeping him away from all of this. It’s better this way.

Just wanted to get this off my chest. Not seeking advice. Just wanted to share.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/LD50_irony on 2023-10-07 23:40:54.

I haven't had kids myself and I have some mild tokophobia. Not bad enough to cause problems, but enough that I know very little about what might be needed, other than general knowledge that a reasonably educated adult woman would have. (I am great with babies and kids in general though, did lots of babysitting as a teen.)

I'm not sure yet whether she's going to want me to be in the room for the birth, but it's a possibility! This is her first baby.

ETA: I'm going to be staying with her for 2-3 weeks. That's the one part of the plan that's decided!

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Practical-Carpet-255 on 2023-10-08 01:49:44.

I can't exactly figure out why but it feels off.

When a dad cannot shut up about his young daughters body? Monitoring her weight, being sensitive to slight changes in size (all explained by the onset of puberty naturally changing her body shape). Withholding food, secretly putting the kid on a diet (in the form of just not making food very available). Stressing out and talking about how the kid used to be thinner and is now getting "chubby" (she is extremely thin and small). All kind of framed as like "what if kids at school make fun of her for being fat?" which I doubt the sincerity of since she is by far the lightest in her class.

10 year old girl. Is this a boundary breaking grooming thing? It just feels kinda creepy.

Sorry for bad formatting, stream of consciousness.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/distorted-laughter on 2023-10-08 00:35:47.

I was raised by a single mother so my parents never married but they lived together very briefly when I was a baby. Now I find that sharing this information with certain men weeds out the absolute worst types of men out there. Example #1 back in April I was seeing this man and of course after a few dates he asked what my family life was like growing up. I told him I was raised by a single mother and my dad used to abuse her physically and mentally so I’m glad she got away from him. He jokingly said “so your mom stayed with him knowing that he was beating the crap out of her? She must have liked getting beaten around then.” I was mortified and genuinely scared that he said this after I shared something so personal with him. Cut all contact afterwards. Example # 2 This guy I met back in mid September who I found out had a child and had a rocky relationship with her mother. This asshole complained about her A LOT and when I was sympathetic towards her when he would mention her I knew it made him mad. He also had a problem with calling women c**ts. And for an educated person who went to nice schools and had a good job I was just disgusted when he let that side out. I feel awful that I even dated those guys however briefly but the fact that they felt this was about single mothers just crushed me. I now realize I was unconsciously taking out the trash when I mentioned those things to them but how can people still be so heartless?

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/illumnat on 2023-10-07 19:24:01.

Just going to try summarize as best I can.

Friend contacted Spectrum cable to cancel service due to moving cross-country at end of month. Rep told her she should move to his area of US. Later, he called her from his personal phone playing a "nice guy role" as a veteran. Has since texted her a number of times which she hasn't looked at or responded to.

His personal phone number (assuming that's what he called/texted from) is from a location that's about 1500 miles from her current location. At the end of the month, she will be moving 1500 miles in an opposite direction from his phone's apparent location and fortunately will not need to open a new Spectrum account for cable.

My feeling was to immediately report this to Spectrum but she's afraid to report it because he has her name, current address and phone number. She said maybe she should wait a couple weeks and then report it.

I understand her fear, but still feel she should report it right away while call logs etc., are still current and available. She's naturally feeling very violated and scared right now even though he hasn't said anything threatening... yet. :-/

What do all of you think? Should this be reported right away or should she wait a couple weeks?

I offered to be on the line with her on a 3-way call with Spectrum if she wants me there for support and will leave the decision to her.

I just hate that there are guys like this out there doing this shit and making women feel scared and not able to just live their lives without worry or fear. *sigh*

Thanks in advance for your advice. I will relay your opinions to her and report back how things go.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/babyjac90 on 2023-10-07 22:12:40.

In every Google search I find it's always been that cotton is the "best" fabric for your nether regions. I am a bit worried that my whole life I have had the opposite effect. I get a reaction from wearing cotton underwear. Not only does it feel uncomfortable, it also makes my region feel unseasonably warm. Everything claims that cotton is "breathable" but I feel like I sweat more with cotton underwear and it dries a lot slower. It tends to stain faster too with very little luck when laundering. Now, I always hear that Nylon, Polyester and "activewear" fabrics are a no go which I really hope isn't entirely true because they have been the best for me so far. I don't ever wash my underwear with fabric softener nor do I wear tight pants often. All synthetic underwear I get has "moisture wicking" written on its packaging and as far as I know, everytime I workout and sweat wearing them, it doesn't feel uncomfortable or doesn't smell and seems to dry faster. Unless I just don't notice. But I tend to be very sensitive with my smell to the point where I always do a double take on myself to make sure I'm not smelling anything and I rarely do. In fact when I wore more cotton in my highschool years, I've had reaction and smell problems quite a but then. But everything I read online claim the opposite of this and I'm just a bit conflicted...

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/ContemplatingFolly on 2023-10-07 21:43:09.

Well, this one takes the cake. (And a lot of other really not great stuff going on in beautiful Louisiana, as I found when I searched to see if this had been posted.)

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Professional_Suit270 on 2023-10-07 21:36:48.

Don’t know if I’m even allowed to post graphic content here, or if people actually wanna see it, but it’s going around on Twitter and it’s beyond hard to look at.

Absolutely insane what’s going on over there.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/magdalenmaybe on 2023-10-07 21:11:32.

Attemping to date again after husband (from whom I (F59) was amicably separated & was successfully co-parenting) died in May of last year. Did the apps, found someone I really like and who reciprocates. Early dating stages, couple of dinners, text, phone, etc., our click was audible. Feeling things I haven't felt in years, and I like it. A lot.

So we're on the phone, discussing things, and he wants to be honest & get something out onto the table. Rambles on & on about our connection and how much he likes me, cut from the same cloth, BUT ...

He can't get past my crooked teeth. Over the years they've moved & I've lost a few molars to bruxism (teeth grinding in my sleep; a stress thing). One of my front bottom teeth has moved back, slightly behind the others. He finds this off-putting. Not quite a deal breaker (what?) but close.

After 4 yrs of braces as a teenager, life had gotten in the way, raising kids, venting my stress on my teeth. There was always something more important that needed to be done than the dentist, and I was frankly a little dental phobic after all those years of old school orthodontia.

It's one of the things I'm most self-conscious about. But he still loves my personality. Yeah, thanks.

I thanked him for being honest, said I understood why he was bringing it up (ostensibly because he wants to move forward). Everyone has their pet peeves - chewing too loudly, farting at the dinner table, etc.

He didn't know that I have an appt with the oral surgeon in two weeks, and after pulling another shell of a molar out, my dentist and I have a plan to get my mouth healthy again. Admittedly, I have little chewing surface left and it's begun to affect my g.i. health too. And I'll probably do a round of Invisalign for the snaggle tooth. It'll take a year and then some, I'm sure. So I'm getting the damn things fixed, but not because of him. Doing it for me. Told him so.

Now I need to decide whether to just crumble, walk away and find someone who doesn't care (and with whom I probably won't be as compatible), or to say "Fuck you - I am what I am, and if you can't walk into this with me because of a tooth, well then, see ya."

I'm leaning towards the latter. I'm a grown-ass woman. Life has thrown considerably heavier shit at me than this and I've survived every time. I'm an absolute pro at keeping my chin up, backwards and in heels.

But I'm hurt. My feelings are actually hurt. And I need a little sisterly reality check to process this. Because right now I'm very much WTF. Thanks ❤️

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/stacko- on 2023-10-07 21:50:56.

I’ve kinda just been in shock and I think I kind of just need reassurance that I’ve done the right thing here.

I’m a huge football (soccer) fan, my boyfriend is not and I’ve known that from the beginning. I’ve barely brought it up to him because I know he doesn’t like it. But today my team won a game in the last minutes of the game and I was excited so I sent him a message saying my team won in the dying minutes of the game. He replied saying “You really misunderstood how little I care about football 😂”. I jokingly responded saying he can at least pretend to care about something I’m excitedly sharing with him. He then said “I really can’t even bring myself to feign interest 😅”.

That actually shocked me. Like what the hell? We then got into an argument because I said that’s such a rude thing to tell someone that you apparently love. It’s not like I asked for a kidney. I said he could’ve just said “oh that’s nice, hope you enjoyed it” and I would’ve been happy. He asked why he has to pretend to enjoy something and that he doesn’t appreciate me pushing my hobbies onto him. He said he’d rather be honest than pretend to care when he doesn’t. He also said “why are you attacking me? If I don’t want to do or talk about something it’s not a line to be blurred just because you want to”.

This has made me feel like he doesn’t even like let alone love me. I don’t think I should be in this relationship anymore. Someone please tell me im not overreacting.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/LaikaMatsu on 2023-10-07 18:05:52.

For reference: i'm 18 years old, 5"1 and about 113 pounds. I'm not skinny but not fat either and certainly not unhealthy.

Here are some things i've been told in the past few months. "Did your legs get fatter?" "Why is your stomach sticking out like that at your age...that's abnormal" "You shouldn't weigh that much, that's not normal" "I won't stop body shaming you until you lose weight" "Look at me. This is discipline." "Eating dessert again...no wonder you're fat"

Even if they say it casually, or claim it's a joke when I start getting upset, it's VERY clear that they mean it. My mom and sister don't have a single problem with my body. It's just the men in the house who love to insult me. I thought that i'd gotten used to it and the words have long stopped affecting me, but i was just complaining about them to my mom and started crying out of nowhere. I feel so bad for myself.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/walkitoff23 on 2023-10-07 14:04:25.

My mom and dad had a big fight. A fight that apprenetly started in the 90s when he accused her of cheating. She said she didnt. He has called her names and even threatened to unalive her the other day(you can refer my post history) hearing those words come out of the person I love and look up to was heartbreaking. It’s been ongoing for the last 2 weeks. He admitted to hitting her when they went to a park to talk about it. This whole time my mom has been the happy her. Making sure we don’t feel any type of way. She just brushes off saying “we are ok”. This all “came to light” yesterday even though we been seeing everything. He wants us all to sit and talk and ik he’s gonna go off like he did yesterday, knowing my mom will tell him that the only reason she said she did it was because he threatened her. Im at work but I can’t focus. All im thinking about is later, i am 26 I should be able to handle this. Should i be grateful they didn’t involve us earlier? Im just lost and numb. My heart hurts. That sinking feeling wont get away

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/BearEatsBlueberries on 2023-10-07 17:20:01.

I’m working a boatload of overtime right now. My partner is in full agreement of me taking on this extra work and has done more around the house/with the kids.

On Tuesday, he asked me if we could host his family for the weekend as it’s Thanksgiving here. I wasn’t sure and reminded him that I was working all week plus a part day Saturday, and then back to work for another 5, busy 12 hour 7-7 day shifts, so part of Sat and all day Sun was my only time off. He said that while he’d like my help with meal planning and cooking on Sunday, he’d take care of the cleaning, shopping, meal prep, organization etc. I agreed, on the condition that he also did all the after-guest cleaning on Monday.

The house isn’t guest clean. It’s “2 working parents on a weeknight” clean. He mopped, but didn’t do a good job vacuuming first so there’s bits of dried dust streaked across the floor. The windows and mirrors are streaky. The laundry basket was on the coffee table with clean laundry, there’s a bit of cat fur on the couch, I don’t think the guest bedrooms were vacuumed, the fridge has crumbs, etc.

I didn’t tell him this, I didn’t complain to him because if we didn’t have guests it would be fine

But I just got a text from his aunt asking if my mental health is okay because she’s never seen my house this messy. Last night when I got home his mom made a comment along the lines of, “I sure can tell you’ve been putting work first lately!” and his dad and uncle cracked “jokes” about how I’m slacking because the whiskey glasses they like were dusty from months of sitting on the shelf (I would anticipate their use and dust them before they come).

So I’m fuming. Nobody said anything to him. They know he took a few days off last week. They know I’m busy working.

Why are women expected to be cleaner and tidier? Why are we held to a higher standard?

This is all bullshit.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Carrion_Luggage on 2023-10-07 16:27:43.

Mine was a year ago and we dated for four months. He was absolute dogshit.

SA Trigger Warning

*Tried to baby trap me two months in, and mentioned naming our future hypothetical daughter after his ex girlfriend *Peed my bed. When I told him he needed to see a doctor, he said he couldn't figure out his insurance card and asked me to call and make his appointment. I didn't. I wonder if he still pees the bed. *Tried to coerce me into sex when I had a 104 degree fever and covid. *Promptly abandoned me when I had covid. *Invited me to dinner with his whole family when they served venison, knowing I did not like it. I had to eat it. *Forcing me to stay on top during sex when I said I was tired and done. *Feigning falling asleep anytime I was hurt or sick via text. *Told me all the time how he ALMOST did stuff for me, like he almost bought me flowers, or he almost tried to be romantic. *Texting his ex when I set boundaries, and I caught him. He literally showed me his texting history. I dumped him that night. *He came back three months later, seething, saying he was sorry that, "he didn't make me feel more secure." That's such a bullshit non apology.

I'm sure there is more. I'll add it as I remember.

Thank you for coming to my Ted talk.

That was my last man.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Illustrious-Cow-5083 on 2023-10-07 14:18:31.

I 35 (f) decided to have a girls night out with friends at a nightclub. This young guy comes up to me and asks me for a dance. At 1st it was sweet and wholesome so I tell him politely that I'm with friends and give him a hug. He then started touching me and calling me tall and thick in front of everyone and rubbing my shoulders. Without looking I feel him grab my butt and luckily that day I'd been holding in a giant vicious fart so I let rip on his creepy little hand. It was loud and my friends saw and heard the situation and laughed. Luckily they rushed to my defense when he tried to intimidate me and size me up by threatening to call the cops and expose him. Sweet Justice. He chickened out.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/lucidlucifer94 on 2023-10-07 12:41:57.

First and foremost I’m neurodivergent, not extremely feminine for a woman, and trying to improve my self awareness and social skills.

Is it normal to very often feel like you’ve accidentally offended another woman if even if you’re not neurodivergent? (Obviously I suspect not as often as me when I’m not being very mindful of my symptoms, but could you give me a general idea). I might have offended one, but another one in the group is still being like my best friend so I got some things right.

How do you personally deal with sensing you’ve offended someone - without going overboard with people pleasing to try and fix a problem that isn’t yours, or on the other side not doing enough to figure out what happened and to make the other person feel comfortable again?

I know it takes all types and some women are way more resilient, don’t get hung up or don’t misinterpret my actions and speech as much as other women can.

I also know that a lot of the time I just do abnormal things that seem to offend people without me realising it would offend them.

I’m very sensitive myself to all the cues and expressions people make once I become aware of them. I can easily take things the wrong way with my history. But I rarely give off an annoyed vibe in this case, and I often sense women giving annoyed or cold vibes and I’m trying so hard to tell the difference between when it’s my fault or when it’s not and whether people are just being over-reactive.

Thanks everyone.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/CraftySappho on 2023-10-07 14:32:21.

I recently went to a queer/sapphic event. I had to go out of town for it, there's so very few wlw events in my area, if any at all.

The amount of cishet men who showed up, had the event explained to them, and still paid cover to stand awkwardly in the corners or tried in vain to hit on attendees was baffling.

One guy just stood uncomfortably close to a couple who were dancing and kissing, and he just stared.

The people working the door did their best to explain that maybe this event isn't the best one for them but nope. They wanted to come invade a feminine and queer space even though they were none of these things.

I used to run these types of events and we were never able to explicitly say cishet men weren't welcome because they'd get us shut down for being exclusionary.

Why? Why do they do this. Well. I know why. But on what fucking planet is this acceptable?

Just let us have this one thing.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Im-A-Kitty-Cat on 2023-10-07 13:03:06.

As demonstrated by the recent askreddit thread about beauty standards people hate. I won’t say that it’s the most misogynistic post I’ve ever seen on this site but I do find the dynamics of it interesting.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/RandallFroggs on 2023-10-07 05:25:12.

This story happened a couple of months ago but I still think about it, and want it off my chest. I was introduced to this guy through a school friend and we instantly hit it off. I am not pretty so I don’t get any guys who approach me and I love the fact that we just kinda clicked. We ended up trading socials and had really fun conversations over insta. He was a bit immature over texts, kept making that’s what she said jokes, but it wasn’t too much like the jokes didn’t go overboard.

Anyways we ended up going on a date and it was pretty different from the first time we met. I felt like I was carrying the conversation, I was just asking him question and he was giving me one word answers. I try to leave cause it’s getting awkward but he asks if we can go on a walk. Me being a wet blanket and to avoid any awkwardness says yes.

This all happened last February when there was still snow on the ground. That’s important because at some point we were near a snow bank and he tried to push me into it. I try to balance and awkwardly laugh cause what else am I supposed to do. He does this multiple times then escalated to throwing snow at me. I’m trying to find a way to go home at this point. But I don’t know how and we end up walking under this bridge and he makes this joke about how if he killed me no one would find my body cause the snow was so high. I just laugh and keep walking with him until he decided he wanted to go home and offered to walk me home. I didn’t know what to do, so he walked me to my front door and gave me this too long hug.

I told my sister about the date and I sad to say at the time I thought nothing was wrong with what he did. I don’t know if this makes sense but it was only until she told me how creepy and messed up the death joke was that I realized how messed up it was. Like who the hell makes a joke like that! And the worst thing was I was considering going on another date with him.

I’m not expecting anyone to respond to this I just needed to get it off my chest. It’s been month but I still think about it

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/OneMinuteSewing on 2023-10-07 04:02:04.

So we are building a camper van, we tend to travel more than we build so it is an ongoing project.

Occasionally I take solo trips or more often I do part of the trip solo and then DH flies out and meets me.

I know these van locks can be picked easily so I wanted to put in some secondary security. I found some solutions that met what I wanted and posted them to a group of people that build out the same brand of van.

I know it isn't to everyone's taste and some people don't want to do it.

But why after I say "...to lock myself in when traveling solo. We had someone try our doors one night when we were camped in a casino parking lot under a bright light. It scared the crap out of me! So I think I'll sleep safer knowing I can stop the doors from being opened by lock picking" (NB, yes I've considered fire safety and made choices accordingly)

...would several men post things like

(I've paraphrased these so I don't have to quote their actual words)

why is everyone scared of people breaking into your van?

If you are that scared that you need chains, you just need to park somewhere safer

I almost never lock my van, especially out in the woods

I've often gone to sleep with the keys in the ignition and the doors unlocked

If someone broke in my van I'd just hang out with them and offer them food

They can just break a window and get in anyway

I'd just shoot them

Some of those comments were after I once again reminded them that for many solo women travelers they don't have the leisure of being casual about their safety.

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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/violetroses22 on 2023-10-07 10:55:05.

I’m freshly out of a long-term relationship and got asked out to a coffee date by a guy that I met in person on my campus. We were talking on Instagram and things were going fine and we were organising the date. He then made a joke about how women don’t think.

Now, if it was one of my close male friends making this joke, I probably wouldn’t of minded it so much. But it’s just a major ick that he’s made such a joke when he barley knows me. I haven’t responded to the message and I don’t know what to do.

It’s probably best not to meet them. It just sucks that it’s been the first time in a while I was approached by a guy and he turned out to be a douchebag 🫠