r/truscum | Because being trans means something.

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/dranowg on 2024-04-10 04:55:52.

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/W-olfsbane on 2024-04-09 20:03:38.

One week post stage 2 of phallo; I got the Foley catheter out today (massive ow, still feeling the dull pain) and no more crazily wrapped penis due to a ton of gauze, meaning I feel incredibly free and like I could do anything.

Now I only have to apply antibiotic gel on the glansplasty graft part and then wrap that with gauze and that’s it, meaning I can also finally wear my regular underwear and not the mesh boxers from the hospital that are quite comfy otherwise tbh, aside from still having the SP catheter which I massively dreaded, but it’s not nearly as much of a challenge as I thought, and is just fine, and if I were to need it for longer than we think (2 more weeks), it wouldn’t all be over for me emotionally as I thought.

I’ve been showering with one hand so far as my penis has been pulling down on my pubic area in an uncomfortable way due to the massive amount of gauze under coban wrap, but now I don’t have to do so anymore and can properly wash my hair and everything else (showering pending, will update in an hour, lol).

One thing I’m worried about, especially as I’ve been paranoid about UL complications now that I’ve actually done it, is that they mentioned I have a small hole on my urethra, but it will probably close by itself, and they did a swab for possible infections.

Edit: showering went good and I can’t believe I have an actual penis now (even though I already did post stage 1, but now it actually looks like a penis)! However, I am very worried about the small hole, because it is not that small. But if they’re not worried, then I’ll try not to be as well.

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/GoofyGooberGlibber on 2024-04-10 01:58:38.

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/bigodoofus on 2024-04-09 23:29:09.

I have only met one other straight trans man besides myself and I’m wondering what that is. I see a lot of straight trans women but not a lot of men. To be fair, I’m in high school, so everyone’s going through changes right now and isn’t sure about their identity. But it sucks for everyone to automatically assume that I’m gay just because I’m trans.

I went stealth for a lot of high school but eventually got outed (I go to a small school so everyone knows me). Most of the time people treat me normally, like how they treated me prior to being outed. But I’m also getting grouped with the effeminate gay trans guys, too. The only other trans guys in my grade are a gay guy with purple hair, a bi guy that doesn’t cut his hair and dates straight guys, and some pan-poly-whatever with a curly rainbow mohawk who wears skirts and eyeliner (they might be non-binary? i’m not sure). All of these people are named after nouns. That’s not me! I don’t know why everyone thinks that that’s me!

Is there a psychological reason for this? Have the trans guys you’ve know detransitioned or come out as straight in the end? Have you seen this trend? This is also kind of a rant but I wanted to hear your experiences and opinions, too.

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/998757748 on 2024-04-09 22:30:47.

i’m a queer cis woman, i’ve been in lgbt spaces for about 10/12 years and watched the rise of nonbinary popularity online and the idea of not needing dysphoria to be trans start popping up like crazy. all the trans people i knew when i was younger very much experienced extreme dysphoria and spoke to me a lot about their feelings with it. those experiences made a huge impact on me and made me feel a strong sense of solidarity and protectiveness over trans folks.

i know a few nb people who have dysphoria and have physically transitioned in some ways, and i do believe them to genuinely be nonbinary rather than gnc. however i also happen to know way too many nonbinary people who either don’t have dysphoria or claim to have it without feeling the need to alter themselves or their appearance in any way and a lot of the ways they talk about gender sometimes rubs me the wrong way.

i used to assume i just ‘didn’t get it’ because im cis, but idk. i’ve heard these people say stuff like gender doesn’t matter and everyone should use they/them, but i know trans people for whom that really fucking does matter and who would feel awful if someone used they pronouns on them (i also get they/them’d a lot because im very mildly gnc and i hate it on principle lol). i get what they’re trying to vye for (that your sex/gender doesn’t have anything to do with the places you can inhabit in society) but i feel like it’s almost transphobic in its own roundabout way.

i guess my question is whether to just hold my tongue and stay out of these conversations irl or if i should say something. would it bother you to hear a cis person bring up things like this? thoughts?

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/Albert_2004 on 2024-04-09 17:39:09.

Like, are gay men transphobic if they prefer men with dicks or lesbian women are it If they prefer women with vaginas?

I'm biased here because i'm a cis Bisexual man, so I don't care about what genitals have the person I gonna fuck.

So, your view?

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/dieSchleiereule7362 on 2024-04-09 19:27:37.

There's a poster on the wall of my endocrinologist's office. It reads something along the lines of: "I wasn't 'born in the wrong body'. I'm a girl, therefore this is a girl's body!"

It makes me uncomfortable.

Not to mention, I recognized the artist due to her past controversy that involved the way in which she drew a piece of fetish art.

I don't care that the artist sees herself in that way; it's the framing of other trans peoples' experiences as negative/bad/wrong that bothers me. The artist may or may not feel gender dysphoria; that has nothing to do with me. She's free to express her experience(s) and live as she wishes.

Thing is, I wouldn't be seeing an endocrinologist—nor started HRT to begin with—if I believed my body was already a man's pre-transition. I'm transitioning to align my body with who I am. Considering the medical setting, I find the whole thing wildly ignorant to borderline offensive. (I'd be less bothered by her art being displayed if it read: "Everyone is different and that's OK!")

Every time I visit this office, I see this poster. I'm unsure if I should say anything or continue to keep my head down. I'd like to avoid souring my relationship with my endo.

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/Ilane06 on 2024-04-09 16:22:43.

I'm so desperate that I would rather being represented by a butch/tomboy than whatever the hell we have ("transmascs"/hyperfem trans men or bimbocore trans men)

Because at least butch and tomboys put more effort to look manly than every so called trans men on tiktok and insta (cuz most of them are just female tucutes who pretend to be trans for attention, while making no effort to pass)

My post sounds messy, but I'm just observing people on social media, and tomboys are more ""trans man coded"" than .... those "transmasc" (bc it's so difficult to say the word "boy/man/dude/guy" nowadays... apparently)

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/No_Macaron_8512 on 2024-04-08 04:00:50.

Maybe it's because I'm boymoding until further notice. I'm boymoding until I have successfully lost enough weight to ALLEVIATE some of this dysphoria. Or maybe it's because my personality just doesn't click?

I can't make gay friends. Ever since I knew I was transgender even all the way back in 2013, going to pride felt... Wrong somehow.

I go to gay bars, I am friends with a lesbian couple. I've been to drag shows. And for an unknown reason. Most gays don't ever reach out to be friends... The only people in my life who have ever actually reached out are straight cis men and women. I try to have gay friends but they don't stick around.

Maybe some of us are just a "cis Becky" in a trans girl's body? Maybe I'm not good at explaining things..... There's just no real sense of community or camaraderie. I don't know how else to explain it.. like yes we are technically all a big part of the LGBTQ+ but I've heard from trans heterosexual post transition men and women (in particular the ones from transmedical) don't really feel like they have an actual place here.... I noticed it too

Cis het men and women have been the only ones to ever reach out, include me in stuff and actually be friends IRL. There's an unknown reason why a lot of gay and trans people don't actually reach out. And I don't know why.

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/pomkombucha on 2024-04-09 04:08:15.

I had a phase of about 2 years where I tried really hard to fit the bill before I came out and I always wondered/worried that had meant that there wasn’t really a way I could be a guy. I would wear revealing clothes and such because it got me attention and I have a lot of neglect trauma (worked through a lot of it now thank god). I also had a lot of messy trauma with my internal understanding of my identity since I was a kid, because my mom hinged pretty much the entirety of our bonding on “being girls” and actively treated my brother significantly worse. Then when I went into foster care, I was dealing with a lot of feeling fundamentally unwanted and my foster sisters would constantly talk about how much attention they got for their looks, and also bullied me about mine, so I tried to start being like them. tw gendered anatomical terms

Basically the signs I had that I wasn’t even actually a chick when I was little was that every bit of self expression I did without being bullied or having some kind of trauma linked to it, was all male oriented. And then I got bullied by my foster family for that too, so I just gave up and tried to act feminine and it wound up getting me that attention I was so deprived of. Then it was a downward spiral from there. Also got caught enjoying male shows with lots of tiddies when I was really little and learned very quickly how not allowed that was.

But all throughout my childhood I had used roleplay as an escape and would and could only ever play dudes. When I would daydream I would imagine myself as a guy with a deeper voice, being able to freely do male mannerisms. Then when I grew up, I entered a male dominated field and constantly wished I could look like the other guys did in my uniform. Eventually after my hyper feminine phase, I remember taking a picture of myself in a button down and wishing that I just didn’t have tits there because they ruined every shirt I tried to wear. Cut to also having fantasies of being able to be the one fucking a woman, wishing I had a penis and the male body to match, and it finally clicked… after two years.

Anybody else have a similar story? I always felt so invalid and worried I was just faking it when I first came out because I really had been SO feminine, but only because I didn’t have concept that it could be any other way. The idea of dressing male in a female body even just wasn’t comforting because I would become hyper aware of the incongruence of what my body looked like and what I expected it to look like.

Anyway I kinda rambled a lot there lol feels good to get that off my chest. Thanks friends

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/imthatdaisy on 2024-04-09 07:47:46.

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/BillDillen on 2024-04-08 22:04:42.

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/Elch5036 on 2024-04-09 03:03:51.

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/-H3LL on 2024-04-09 01:59:56.

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/UrDad_Hamza on 2024-04-08 22:45:02.

For context - I'm 18 transsex male, PRE- HRT, but gonna start it in a month or so

Yeah so I genuinely feel what I said in the title

I don't understand how such a masculine guy is born in a f body

I'm litterally the most masculine guy, the most stereotypical male

How the fuck did this freaking happen

Where is my penis😭😭😭 where the hell is it

I always, since a baby wanted to be the strongest MAN ,unaware that my body is similar to Females

I only realised this when I was in 10th grade and before that i always thought somehow I will grow up and be a man

But it was a shocker when i realised how people actually Perceive me and what my body is

Like just HOW, how is there no penis down there And why is my chest so weird

I just don't get it, how it's possible

It's a curse man, it's a fucking curse

And there's no one day where I don't think about dying

AND HERE'S even more worst part after feeling all of this and suffering for months and years, i still have bouts of imposter Syndrome (This began recently)

Like omg what if I'm faking it, what if I'm not really a man, what if I'm brainwashed etc etc etc 😣

And it is so fucking distressing!!

Like I'm a man bitch, why do you question it (telling this to my brain)

I do not wish this disorder or whatever it is on anybody!

It fucking sucks!!!

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/OkLong582 on 2024-04-08 05:13:06.

I (26F, hetero) transitioned a bit over four years ago. My transition was not successful. I do not pass, and I am ugly. I have been hormones for roughly seven years, and have been consistently on them at good levels for four of those. Basically, I should be post-transition, but you can hardly tell that I did in the first place.

My life is measurably worse than it was four years ago. While I'm pretty fortunate with my current job, my career prospects are poor, because nobody wants to hire a visible transsexual. My dating options are limited to fetishists on grindr, who do not treat me well. My social life is equally messy, because I do not get along well with other LGBT people (today, having gender dysphoria is not something with a lot of currency...). FFS and other surgeries are financially out of reach forever (only Americans can get coverage for that sort of thing).

For the last year or so, I've been taking stock of my current situation, and I can't help but conclude that swallowing my pride, admitting that I failed to transition, and going back to living as a gay man is the best way forward. Since my gender dysphoria is not better than it was four years ago, this seems like the sensible thing for me to do. While I have to live with crushing daily gender dysphoria either way, the circumstances of my life will improve a lot by detransitioning.

So I guess I'm looking for genuinely dysphoric men who've detransitioned and have some perspective on what worked for them:

1. How did coming out as a man work for you? How did you handle telling other people?
2. Are there any other alternatives to managing gender dysphoria?
3. How do you deal with conversations around transness? It's something that comes up a lot in the current zeitgeist, and I imagine I'd have to choose whether to shut up or be more vocal about my experiences with it.

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/CaramelNervous5384 on 2024-04-08 00:42:02.

(Not asking for advice, just wanting to know your experiences. The only reason I started talking about myself was to put words, you don't need to read it)

I think I might have physical and maybe social dysphoria (really upset with my female anatomy, would like male features) but I'm being raised in a house where my dad quite openly has some warped perception of women, and also said he wants me to learn to cook, not to feed myself, but so that I "make [my] future husband happy."

Additionally i think his negative view of women may have influenced me, i.e. I noticed I'm more judgy with girls than with boys (I will work on that) Sorry if this is painful or cringeworthy to read but in short I'm worried I have internalized misogyny that I'm confusing with dysphoria.

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/DarkAral2135 on 2024-04-07 14:32:05.

I wasn’t gender dysphoric, but I did socially transitioned. Didn’t got the chance to start a medical transition, fortunately.

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/Actuallythanos1999 on 2024-04-08 11:29:40.

Basically the title. I see posts all the time about how people don't understand what gender dysphoria actually is or talking about euphoria on other subreddits. If there was a way to change the terminology in the criteria for GD what would you edit? Or would you? I'm just curious

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/TrueContribution3415 on 2024-04-08 09:54:40.

Guess i'll elaborate on this yeah. When you think about it, if being trans is about being another gender and being "transmasc" / "transfem" is considered only partially leaning towards masculinity/feminity, doesn't anyone ever consider maybe tucute transmascs are literally just masculine girls and transfems are literally just feminine boys? ( Not including binary trans men and trans women. )

The big common issue I see here ( especially with trans mascs, as a binary trans man myself ) is that often times the only thing they change is their pronouns to "he/him". Some of them might just shorten their hair but often times they just continue to present themselves as women without really trying. Some of them swear up and down that apparently by identifying as their assigned gender, female, they somehow can't be masculine - but they also do not dream about necessarily being the opposite gender the full way or wanting to be born with male parts. Hell, some of them don't even try to be masculine.

This just seems like a case of internalized misogyny, in my opinion. Controversial take but I'm pretty sure you can still wear baggy clothes and have short hair while being a girl. You can still act rowdy... While being a girl. And in my opinion nobody's really stopping them from using "he/him" pronouns while still being a girl since there's that one tucute belief where gender =/= pronouns anyways, so what's stopping them? They literally don't wish to be a man, they just wish to be equally treated as one, and they feel like being dubbed as 'feminine' ( aka. What women are often expected to be ) makes them inherently lesser.

That's not being trans. That's internalized misogyny.

And while we're on the topic of this I'd also like to talk about supposed demiboys. The most common reason I see about people calling themselves demiboys is because "while they could gladly dub themselves as binary men, they feel a certain disconnect from true masculinity". That just means that you may be a feminine binary trans man and may want to express that a bit more, and that's okay, not everyone may want to hit all those super duper trad masc roles and that's aight.

Another supposed reason for this is because they view their gender more as an "aesthetic" or how they want others to percieve them. The most common example I've been given is that they imagine themselves/want to be percieved as men with a more "androgynous" look/body type. ( Most common examples include characters from Houseki no Kuni or Satan from Devilman Crybaby. ) In reality, they could just be men who once again, may not fit into super trad masc roles and occasionally do "effeminate" things like having long hair and doing nails while still making an effort to transition. There are plenty of androgynous binary men out there which could lead them by example while realizing that does not make them any less of their gender.

tl;dr i don't think transmasc and transfem are actual terms, they're just either used for tucutes with internalized misogyny/misandry or binary transmen/transwomen who may be gnc but are in denial over it. feel free to add onto this civilly.

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/malicious-pancakes on 2024-04-07 18:56:06.

After a long time clinging to the belief I'm bisexual, I've just come to terms with the possibility that I might just be gay.

I didn't really care that much that I liked men when I thought I could just choose to date women, and ignore that I also liked guys. But the more I think about it, the more it seems like I only really like the idea of having a girlfriend to reinforce that I'm a "real man."

It was probably sort of a naive way of looking at it, but functionally, I could have appeared as a "normal" guy if I passed and had a girlfriend.

Lol, the more I type it out, the more stupid and insensitive I think it sounds. Sorry if I'm sounding like a homophobic asshole.

I just got so accustomed to the thought that once I transitioned I could socially integrate that the idea of actually not having the option (unless I don't date) kind of freaked me out when it dawned on me. Being gay isn't as big of a deal as it used to be, and I don't even know if I'd be in any real danger where I'm at... I think I'm just babbling at this point.

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/Albert_2004 on 2024-04-07 18:42:02.

I make this question here because I asked this exact question in a trans subreddit and majority of them said that they disliked the show, and also they started attacking me for saying that I like the show despite me supporting trans rights.

Now, seeing that your views are different compared to mainstream trans subreddits, what do you think about it? The show it's really bigoted or do you think it's funny?

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/Pikpikicecream on 2024-04-07 18:07:25.

Disclaimer: I am not questioning being a “half boy.” That is complete nonsense. Just came across the video on youtube and watched it out of curiosity.

“1: You feel disconnected to traditional masculinity”

Ok what.

I was appalled when I heard that statement on a video that tells you signs you might be a “demiboy.”

It just shows that (many) tucutes equate gender with gender EXPRESSION… Especially in (ew) egg culture.

A cis man shows interest in activities which are typically associated with femininity: Painting nails, doing makeup, etc and stuff.

A tucute excitedly runs to the man, points a finger at him, and screams out, “omg ur trans I support you!1!!!”

“What are you… What??”

“Aww are you in denial? We have an egg here just wanting to hatch uwu. just accept the fact that ur trans o w 0”

“I’m not transgender…”

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/Fuzzy_Performance_44 on 2024-04-07 16:45:27.

just like the title says, my bf doesnt believe that i am trans, ive been trying to tell him for a month now but he still thinks that im doing a running joke, hes been really pushy about us wanting to have sex but he seriously believes that im cis, i dont know what to do because he sometimes gets really angry when i try to make him understand saying that "i ruin his mood"

on top of that i think he also is really porn rot, he really likes me because im skinny, petite looking, he has told me his kinks and the one that wants to do the most is anal and honestly i dont know if he puts me in a situation where hes forceful if i could be in danger. (since im pre- bottom surgery)

i just need to know how to tackle this because he is not a bad guy but he really is sex obssesed without a day going by he doesnt sort of sexualize me? or like just push a little

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The original was posted on /r/truscum by /u/sansboi11 on 2024-04-07 05:13:49.

if they are from Lesbos, Greece